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Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny

Week of March 31st, 2022


(December 22-January 19)
A nutritionist named Mark Haub decided to try losing weight by eating only sugary treats. For 10 weeks, he snacked on junk food cakes, cookies, and sweet cereals. By the end, he had lost 27 pounds. In accordance with astrological omens, I suggest you try the metaphorical equivalents of this project. For instance, work on deepening your relationships by engaging your allies in shallow conversations about trivial subjects. Or see if you can enhance your physical fitness by confining your exercise to crossing and uncrossing your legs as you sit on the couch watching TV. APRIL FOOL! I lied. Here's your real horoscope: For the next four weeks, take better care of your body and your relationships than you ever have before in your life. Make it a point to educate yourself about what that would entail, and be devoted in providing the most profound nurturing you can imagine.


Sometimes it's a challenge to try to figure out what's important and what's not important. Sometimes you need a bit of extra help as you try to understand how your problems might be opportunities in disguise. If you'd like more of my input, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.