"People don’t want their lives fixed," proclaims Chuck Palahniuk in his novel Survivor. "Nobody wants their problems solved. Their dramas. Their distractions. Their stories resolved. Their messes cleaned up. Because what would they have left? Just the big scary unknown." Your challenge in the coming weeks, Pisces, is to prove Palahniuk wrong, at least in regards to you. From what I can tell, you will have unprecedented opportunities to solve problems and fix your life. And if you take even partial advantage of this gift, you will not be plunged into the big scary unknown, but rather into a constructive new phase of shaping your identity.

*

It's not too late to listen to my Big-Picture, In-Depth Explorations of Your Destiny in 2016. What will be the story of your life in the coming months? What new influences will be headed your way? What fresh resources will you be able to draw on? How can you conspire with life to create the best possible future for yourself?

Each report in the three-part series of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES is 7 to 9 minutes long. Register and/or log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Range Prediction, Part 1, Part 2, or Part 3."

A new short-term audio forecast for this week is also available. Get help as you fine-tune your life to be in closer and closer alignment with your soul's code! Register and/or sign in to access the 'scopes here.

The cost is $6 per sign, but there are discounts if you buy multiple tokens.

*

SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
*
I hope you can obtain the Avatar Elixir stashed in the golden obelisk in the underground fortress beneath the glass mountain. It will allow you to produce the "triple-helix" energy that will give you the power to cross freely back and forth through the gateway between universes.

Then the thunder and lightning will obey your commands. Rivers and comets will become your allies. Every star in the sky will shine directly on you. Animals will prove their love again and again. You will always know the truest words to say.

And if for some reason you're not able to get your hands on that Avatar Elixir, you may be able to achieve similar results by drinking a bottle of beer that's currently stashed in the lower left rear section of the beverage cooler at a convenience store within five miles of your home.

(Magic might be wherever you think it is.)