"I don't want to play the part of the mythical phoenix again," my Scorpio friend Kelly has been moaning as she prepares for her latest trial by fire. "I've burned myself to the ground and risen reborn out of the ashes two times this year already. Why can't someone else take a turn for a change?" While I empathized, I thought it was my duty to tell her what I consider to be the truth: More than any other sign of the zodiac, you Scorpios have supreme skills in the art of metaphorical self-immolation and regeneration. You're better able to endure the ordeal, too. Besides, part of you actually enjoys the heroic drama and the baby-fresh feelings that come over you as you reanimate yourself from the soot and cinders. Ready for another go?

What exactly are you looking for? How would you describe the experiences you want more than anything else? It's possible my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE could give you additional help in figuring that out.

*

SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
ARGUMENTS WITH GOD is the only organization on the planet that specializes in the art of debating with the Creator. Our trained Prayer Warriors are standing by, ready to deliver the protests and complaints that you want to convey. Send your mad, rebellious, poignant appeals to Truthrooster@gmail.com, and we will relay them directly to the Cosmic Trickster with persuasive eloquence. Write your first draft.
*
The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.