Blaming others for our problems is rarely helpful. If we expend emotional energy focusing on how people have offended and hurt us, we diminish our motivation to heal ourselves. We may also get distracted from changing the behavior that ushered us into the mess. So yes, it’s wise to accept responsibility for the part we have played in propagating predicaments. However, I believe it's also counterproductive to be relentlessly serious about this or any other psychological principle. We all benefit from having mischievous fun as we rebel against tendencies we have to be dogmatic and fanatical. That’s why I am authorizing you to celebrate a good-humored Complaint Fest. For a limited time only, feel free to unleash fantasies in which you uninhibitedly and hilariously castigate everyone who has done you wrong.

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