The people of Northern Ireland have over 70 colorful slang terms for being drunk. These include splootered, stonkied, squiffy, cabbaged, stinkered, ballbagged, wingdinged, bluttered, and wanked. I am begging you, Capricorn, to refrain from those states for at least two weeks. According to my reading of the omens, it's important for you to avoid the thrills and ills of alcohol. I am completely in favor of you pursuing natural highs, however. I would love you to get your mind blown and your heart opened through epiphanies and raptures that take you to the frontiers of consciousness.

*

If you would like to support my work, please consider buying my new book Astrology Is Real.

And/or buy my Expanded Audio Horoscopes and Daily Text Message Horoscopes.

You could also be a free or paid subscriber of my weekly newsletter — and get access to my other writing and music.

Just want to give a one-time donation? Go HERE and contribute via the "Friends and Family" option.