At least for now, help may not be available from the usual sources. Is the doctor sick? Does mommy need mothering? Is the therapist feeling depressed? My advice is to not worry about the deficiencies, but rather shift your attention to skillful surrogates and substitutes. They may give you what you need—and even more. I’m reminded of *The Crystal Cave*, a novel about the Arthurian legend. The king, Ambrosius Aurelianus, advises the magician Merlin, “Take power where it is offered.” In other words: not where you think or wish power would be, but from sources that are unexpected or outside your customary parameters.

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