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Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny


Week of March 17th, 2022

♈ ARIES

(March 21-April 19)
Singer, dancer, and comedian Sammy Davis Jr. disliked the song "The Candy Man," but he recorded it anyway, heeding his advisors. He spent just a brief time in the studio, finishing his vocals in two takes. "The song is going straight to the toilet," he complained, "pulling my career down with it." Surprise! It became the best-selling tune of his career, topping the Billboard charts for three weeks. I suspect there could be a similar phenomenon (or two!) in your life during the coming months, Aries. Don't be too sure you know how or where your interesting accomplishments will arise.

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♉ TAURUS

(April 20-May 20)
I love author Maya Angelou's definition of high accomplishment, and I recommend you take steps to make it your own in the coming weeks. She wrote, "Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it." Please note that in her view, success is not primarily about being popular, prestigious, powerful, or prosperous. I'm sure she wouldn't exclude those qualities from her formula, but the key point is that they are all less crucial than self-love. Please devote quality time to refining and upgrading this aspect of your drive for success.

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My EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES about Your Long-Range Outlook will be available for one more week. It's your last chance to hear my Big-Picture Forecast for your next nine months.

A new short-term audio forecast is also available. Get help and inspiration as you fine-tune your life to be in closer and closer alignment with your soul's code! Register and/or sign in to access the 'scopes here





♊ GEMINI

(May 21-June 20)
"I'm not fake in any way," declared Gemini actor Courteney Cox. On the face of it, that's an amazing statement for a Gemini to make. After all, many in your tribe are masters of disguise and shapeshifting. Cox herself has won accolades for playing a wide variety of characters during her film and TV career, ranging from comedy to drama to horror. But let's consider the possibility that, yes, you Geminis can be versatile, mutable, and mercurial, yet also authentic and genuine. I think this specialty of yours could and should be extra prominent in the coming weeks.

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My EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES about Your Long-Range Outlook will be available for one more week. It's your last chance to hear my Big-Picture Forecast for your next nine months.

A new short-term audio forecast is also available. Get help and inspiration as you fine-tune your life to be in closer and closer alignment with your soul's code! Register and/or sign in to access the 'scopes here





♋ CANCERIAN

(June 21-July 22)
"Sometimes I prayed for Baby Jesus to make me good, but Baby Jesus didn't," wrote author Barbara Kingsolver about her childhood approach to self-improvement. Just because this method failed to work for her, however, doesn't mean it won't work for others. In saying that, I'm not implying you should send out appeals to Baby Jesus. But I suggest you call on your imagination to help you figure out what influences may, in fact, boost your goodness. It's an excellent time to seek help as you elevate your integrity, expand your compassion, and deepen your commitment to ethical behavior. It's not that you're deficient in those departments; just that now is your special time to do what we all need to do periodically: Make sure our actual behavior is in rapt alignment with our high ideals.

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My EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES about Your Long-Range Outlook will be available for one more week. It's your last chance to hear my Big-Picture Forecast for your next nine months.

A new short-term audio forecast is also available. Get help and inspiration as you fine-tune your life to be in closer and closer alignment with your soul's code! Register and/or sign in to access the 'scopes here





♌ LEO

(July 23-August 22)
Leo classicist and author Edith Hamilton specialized in the history of ancient Greece. The poet Homer was one of the most influential voices of that world. Hamilton wrote, "An ancient writer said of Homer that he touched nothing without somehow honoring and glorifying it." I love that about his work, and I invite you to match his energy in the coming weeks. I realize that's a lot to ask. But according to my reading of the astrological omens, you will indeed have a knack for honoring and glorifying all you touch.

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My EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES about Your Long-Range Outlook will be available for one more week. It's your last chance to hear my Big-Picture Forecast for your next nine months.

A new short-term audio forecast is also available. Get help and inspiration as you fine-tune your life to be in closer and closer alignment with your soul's code! Register and/or sign in to access the 'scopes here





♍ VIRGO

(August 23-September 22)
Starhawk, one of my favorite witches, reminds us that "sexuality is the expression of the creative life force of the universe. It is not dirty, nor is it merely 'normal'; it is sacred. And sacred can also be affectionate, joyful, pleasurable, passionate, funny, or purely animal." I hope you enjoy an abundance of such lushness in the coming weeks, Virgo. It's a favorable time in your astrological cycle for synergizing eros and spirituality. You have poetic license to express your delight about being alive with imaginative acts of sublime love.

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My EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES about Your Long-Range Outlook will be available for one more week. It's your last chance to hear my Big-Picture Forecast for your next nine months.

A new short-term audio forecast is also available. Get help and inspiration as you fine-tune your life to be in closer and closer alignment with your soul's code! Register and/or sign in to access the 'scopes here





♎ LIBRA

(September 23-October 22)
In 1634, English poet John Milton coined the phrase "silver lining." It has become an idiom referring to a redemptive aspect of an experience that falls short of expectations. Over 350 years later, American author Arthur Yorinks wrote, "Too many people miss the silver lining because they’re expecting gold." Now I'm relaying his message to you. Hopefully, my heads-up will ensure that you won't miss the silver lining for any reason, including the possibility that you're fixated on gold.

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My EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES about Your Long-Range Outlook will be available for one more week. It's your last chance to hear my Big-Picture Forecast for your next nine months.

A new short-term audio forecast is also available. Get help and inspiration as you fine-tune your life to be in closer and closer alignment with your soul's code! Register and/or sign in to access the 'scopes here





♏ SCORPIO

(October 23-November 21)
"This is the most profound spiritual truth I know," declares author Anne Lamott. "That even when we're most sure that love can't conquer all, it seems to anyway. It goes down into the rat hole with us, in the guise of our friends, and there it swells and comforts. It gives us second winds, third winds, hundredth winds." Lamott's thoughts will be your wisdom to live by during the next eight weeks, Scorpio. Even if you think you already know everything there is to know about the powers of love to heal and transform, I urge you to be open to new powers that you have never before seen in action.

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My EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES about Your Long-Range Outlook will be available for one more week. It's your last chance to hear my Big-Picture Forecast for your next nine months.

A new short-term audio forecast is also available. Get help and inspiration as you fine-tune your life to be in closer and closer alignment with your soul's code! Register and/or sign in to access the 'scopes here





♐ SAGITTARIUS

(November 22-December 21)
Witty Sagittarian author Ashleigh Brilliant has created thousands of cheerful yet often sardonic epigrams. In accordance with current astrological omens, I have chosen six that will be useful for you to treat as your own in the coming weeks. 1. "I may not be totally perfect, but parts of me are excellent." 2. "I have abandoned my search for truth and am now looking for a good fantasy." 3. "All I want is a warm bed and a kind word and unlimited power." 4. "Do your best to satisfy me—that's all I ask of everybody." 5. "I'm just moving clouds today, tomorrow I'll try mountains." 6. "A terrible thing has happened. I have lost my will to suffer."

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My EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES about Your Long-Range Outlook will be available for one more week. It's your last chance to hear my Big-Picture Forecast for your next nine months.

A new short-term audio forecast is also available. Get help and inspiration as you fine-tune your life to be in closer and closer alignment with your soul's code! Register and/or sign in to access the 'scopes here





♑ CAPRICORN

(December 22-January 19)
"All experience is an enrichment rather than an impoverishment," wrote author Eudora Welty. That may seem like a simple and obvious statement, but in my view, it's profound and revolutionary. Too often, we are inclined to conclude that a relatively unpleasant or inconvenient event has diminished us. And while it may indeed have drained some of our vitality or caused us angst, it has almost certainly taught us a lesson or given us insight that will serve us well in the long run—if only to help us avoid similar downers in the future. According to my analysis of your current astrological omens, these thoughts are of prime importance for you right now.

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My EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES about Your Long-Range Outlook will be available for one more week. It's your last chance to hear my Big-Picture Forecast for your next nine months.

A new short-term audio forecast is also available. Get help and inspiration as you fine-tune your life to be in closer and closer alignment with your soul's code! Register and/or sign in to access the 'scopes here





♒ AQUARIUS

(January 20- February 18)
"Life swarms with innocent monsters," observed poet Charles Baudelaire. Who are the "innocent monsters"? I'll suggest a few candidates. Boring people who waste your time but who aren't inherently evil. Cute advertisements that subtly coax you to want stuff you don't really need. Social media that seem like amusing diversions except for the fact that they suck your time and drain your energy. That's the bad news, Aquarius. The good news is that the coming weeks will be a favorable time to eliminate from your life at least some of those innocent monsters. You're entering a period when you'll have a strong knack for purging "nice" influences that aren't really very nice.

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My EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES about Your Long-Range Outlook will be available for one more week. It's your last chance to hear my Big-Picture Forecast for your next nine months.

A new short-term audio forecast is also available. Get help and inspiration as you fine-tune your life to be in closer and closer alignment with your soul's code! Register and/or sign in to access the 'scopes here





♓ PISCES

(February 19-March 20)
"Never underestimate the wisdom of being easily satisfied," wrote aphorist Marty Rubin. If you're open to welcoming such a challenge, Pisces, I propose that you work on being very easily satisfied during the coming weeks. See if you can figure out how to enjoy even the smallest daily events with blissful gratitude. Exult in the details that make your daily rhythm so rich. Use your ingenuity to deepen your capacity for regarding life as an ongoing miracle. If you do this right, there will be no need to pretend you're having fun. You will vividly enhance your sensitivity to the ordinary glories we all tend to take for granted.

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My EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES about Your Long-Range Outlook will be available for one more week. It's your last chance to hear my Big-Picture Forecast for your next nine months.

A new short-term audio forecast is also available. Get help and inspiration as you fine-tune your life to be in closer and closer alignment with your soul's code! Register and/or sign in to access the 'scopes here






Listen to Rob's Expanded Audio Horoscopes, updated weekly.



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