Upcoming adventures might make you more manly if you are a woman. If you are a man, the coming escapades could make you more womanly. How about if you're trans? Odds are that you'll become even more gender fluid. I am exaggerating a bit, of course. The transformations I'm referring to may not be visible to casual observers. They will mostly unfold in the depths of your psyche. But they won't be merely symbolic, either. There'll be mutations in your biochemistry that will expand your sense of your own gender. If you respond enthusiastically to these shifts, you will begin a process that could turn you into an even more complete and attractive human being than you already are.

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I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR BIG-PICTURE PREVIEW -- an audio report about YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2016."

What are your visions and plans for your life in the next ten to fifteen months? Could you use some inspiration as you mobilize your higher powers? Tune in. (The cost for either the weekly forecast or the long-term report is $6, with discounts for multiple purchases.)

You can also hear a shorter-term forecast for the week ahead by clicking on "This week (July 12, 2016)."

Whether or not you want to listen to those Big Picture audio reports for the rest of 2016 and beyond, you may be interested in reviewing the long-term horoscopes I wrote for you early this year. They discuss your best potential destiny for all of 2016. To see them, go here.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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"God offers to every mind its choice between truth and repose," wrote Ralph Waldo Emerson. "Take which you please; you can never have both." What's an example from your own life that refutes or proves Emerson's assertion?

I'll name five heroic tasks you will have more than enough power to accomplish in the next eight months. 1. Turning an adversary into an ally. 2. Converting a debilitating obsession into a empowering passion. 3. Transforming an obstacle into a motivator. 4. Discovering small treasures in the midst of junk and decay. 5. Using the unsolved riddles of childhood to create a living shrine to eternal youth. 6. Gathering a slew of new freedom songs, learning them by heart, and singing them regularly -- especially when habitual fears rise up in you.

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I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR BIG-PICTURE PREVIEW -- an audio report about YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2016."

What are your visions and plans for your life in the next ten to fifteen months? Could you use some inspiration as you mobilize your higher powers? Tune in. (The cost for either the weekly forecast or the long-term report is $6, with discounts for multiple purchases.)

You can also hear a shorter-term forecast for the week ahead by clicking on "This week (July 12, 2016)."

Whether or not you want to listen to those Big Picture audio reports for the rest of 2016 and beyond, you may be interested in reviewing the long-term horoscopes I wrote for you early this year. They discuss your best potential destiny for all of 2016. To see them, go here.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Brag about what you can't do and don't have. Bow down to the greatest mystery you know. Scare yourself with how beautiful you are.

Your life has resemblances to a jigsaw puzzle that lies unassembled on a kitchen table. Unbeknownst to you, but revealed to you by me, a few of the pieces are missing. Maybe your cat knocked them under the refrigerator, or they fell out of their storage box somewhere along the way. But this doesn't have to be a problem. I believe you can mostly put together the puzzle without the missing fragments. At the end, when you're finished, you may be tempted to feel frustration that the picture's not complete. But that would be illogical perfectionism. Ninety-seven-percent success will be just fine.

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I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR BIG-PICTURE PREVIEW -- an audio report about YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2016."

What are your visions and plans for your life in the next ten to fifteen months? Could you use some inspiration as you mobilize your higher powers? Tune in. (The cost for either the weekly forecast or the long-term report is $6, with discounts for multiple purchases.)

You can also hear a shorter-term forecast for the week ahead by clicking on "This week (July 12, 2016)."

Whether or not you want to listen to those Big Picture audio reports for the rest of 2016 and beyond, you may be interested in reviewing the long-term horoscopes I wrote for you early this year. They discuss your best potential destiny for all of 2016. To see them, go here.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Pretend your wounds are exotic tattoos. Sip the tears of someone you love. Rebel against your horoscope. Play games with no rules. Mock your fears.

If you are smoothly attuned with the cosmic rhythms and finely aligned with your unconscious wisdom, you could wake up one morning and find that a mental block has miraculously crumbled, instantly raising your intelligence. If you can find it in your proud heart to surrender to "God," your weirdest dilemma will get at least partially solved during a magical three-hour interlude. And if you are able to forgive 50 percent of the wrongs that have been done to you in the last six years, you will no longer feel like you're running into a strong wind, but rather you'll feel like the beneficiary of a strong wind blowing in the same direction you're headed.

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I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR BIG-PICTURE PREVIEW -- an audio report about YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2016."

What are your visions and plans for your life in the next ten to fifteen months? Could you use some inspiration as you mobilize your higher powers? Tune in. (The cost for either the weekly forecast or the long-term report is $6, with discounts for multiple purchases.)

You can also hear a shorter-term forecast for the week ahead by clicking on "This week (July 12, 2016)."

Whether or not you want to listen to those Big Picture audio reports for the rest of 2016 and beyond, you may be interested in reviewing the long-term horoscopes I wrote for you early this year. They discuss your best potential destiny for all of 2016. To see them, go here.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Teach an animal to dance. Hire a puppet troupe to reenact your life story using marionettes in Renaissance costumes. Make believe you are the ocean king or thunder queen.

How often have you visited hell or the suburbs of hell during the last few weeks? According to my guesstimates, the time you spent there was exactly the right amount. You got the teachings you needed most, including a few tricks about how to steer clear of hell in the future. With this valuable information, you will forevermore be smarter about how to avoid unnecessary pain and irrelevant hindrances. So congratulations! I suggest you celebrate. And please use your new-found wisdom as you decline one last invitation to visit the heart of a big, hot mess.

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I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR BIG-PICTURE PREVIEW -- an audio report about YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2016."

What are your visions and plans for your life in the next ten to fifteen months? Could you use some inspiration as you mobilize your higher powers? Tune in. (The cost for either the weekly forecast or the long-term report is $6, with discounts for multiple purchases.)

You can also hear a shorter-term forecast for the week ahead by clicking on "This week (July 12, 2016)."

Whether or not you want to listen to those Big Picture audio reports for the rest of 2016 and beyond, you may be interested in reviewing the long-term horoscopes I wrote for you early this year. They discuss your best potential destiny for all of 2016. To see them, go here.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Improvise a fresh bedtime story for someone you love. Put on an inflatable sumo wrestler costume and play a bagpipe as badly as possible. Watch TV with your third eye.

My friend Athena works as a masseuse. She says that the highest praise she can receive is drool. When her clients feel so sublimely serene that threads of spit droop out of their mouths, she knows she's in top form. You might trigger responses akin to drool in the coming weeks, Virgo. Even if you don't work as a massage therapist, I think it's possible you'll provoke rather extreme expressions of approval, longing, and curiosity. You will be at the height of your power to inspire potent feelings in those you encounter. In light of this situation, you might want to wear a small sign or button that reads, "You have my permission to drool freely."

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I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR BIG-PICTURE PREVIEW -- an audio report about YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2016."

What are your visions and plans for your life in the next ten to fifteen months? Could you use some inspiration as you mobilize your higher powers? Tune in. (The cost for either the weekly forecast or the long-term report is $6, with discounts for multiple purchases.)

You can also hear a shorter-term forecast for the week ahead by clicking on "This week (July 12, 2016)."

Whether or not you want to listen to those Big Picture audio reports for the rest of 2016 and beyond, you may be interested in reviewing the long-term horoscopes I wrote for you early this year. They discuss your best potential destiny for all of 2016. To see them, go here.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Plant roses on a strip-mined hill. Sip holy water blessed by a smart teenage girl. Bear in mind that you are the Chosen One, and so is everyone else.

The latest Free Will Astrology poll shows that thirty-three percent of your friends, loved ones, and acquaintances approve of your grab for glory. Thirty-eight percent disapprove, eighteen percent remain undecided, and eleven percent wish you would grab for even greater glory. As for me, I'm aligned with the eleven-percent minority. Here's what I say: Don't allow your quest for shiny breakthroughs and brilliant accomplishments to be overly influenced by what people think of you.

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I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR BIG-PICTURE PREVIEW -- an audio report about YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2016."

What are your visions and plans for your life in the next ten to fifteen months? Could you use some inspiration as you mobilize your higher powers? Tune in. (The cost for either the weekly forecast or the long-term report is $6, with discounts for multiple purchases.)

You can also hear a shorter-term forecast for the week ahead by clicking on "This week (July 12, 2016)."

Whether or not you want to listen to those Big Picture audio reports for the rest of 2016 and beyond, you may be interested in reviewing the long-term horoscopes I wrote for you early this year. They discuss your best potential destiny for all of 2016. To see them, go here.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Thank your mother for the pain she endured while birthing you. For three minutes on the first Friday of every month, close your eyes and imagine yourself riding a wild horse through a cemetery. Fantasize that your so-called "dark side" is sweet and creamy.

You are at the pinnacle of your powers to both hurt and heal. Your turbulent yearnings could disrupt the integrity of those whose self-knowledge is shaky, even as your smoldering radiance can illuminate the darkness for those who are lost or weak. As strong and confident as I am, even I would be cautious about engaging your tricky intelligence. Your piercing perceptions and wild understandings might either undo me or vitalize me. Given these volatile conditions, I advise everyone to approach you as if you were a love bomb or a truth fire or a beauty tornado.

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I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR BIG-PICTURE PREVIEW -- an audio report about YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2016."

What are your visions and plans for your life in the next ten to fifteen months? Could you use some inspiration as you mobilize your higher powers? Tune in. (The cost for either the weekly forecast or the long-term report is $6, with discounts for multiple purchases.)

You can also hear a shorter-term forecast for the week ahead by clicking on "This week (July 12, 2016)."

Whether or not you want to listen to those Big Picture audio reports for the rest of 2016 and beyond, you may be interested in reviewing the long-term horoscopes I wrote for you early this year. They discuss your best potential destiny for all of 2016. To see them, go here.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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When you come home after a day of triumphs, take out the garbage. Dream you're a red-tailed hawk soaring over a shopping mall. Forgive yourself for the blindness that put you in the path of those who betrayed you.

Here's the deal: I will confess a dark secret from my past if you confess an equivalent secret from yours. Shall I go first? When I first got started in the business of writing horoscope columns, I contributed a sexed-up monthly edition to a porn magazine published by smut magnate Larry Flynt. What's even more scandalous is that I enjoyed doing it. OK. It's your turn. Locate a compassionate listener who won't judge you harshly, and unveil one of your subterranean mysteries. You may be surprised at how much psychic energy this will liberate. (For extra credit and emancipation, spill two or even three secrets.)

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I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR BIG-PICTURE PREVIEW -- an audio report about YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2016."

What are your visions and plans for your life in the next ten to fifteen months? Could you use some inspiration as you mobilize your higher powers? Tune in. (The cost for either the weekly forecast or the long-term report is $6, with discounts for multiple purchases.)

You can also hear a shorter-term forecast for the week ahead by clicking on "This week (July 12, 2016)."

Whether or not you want to listen to those Big Picture audio reports for the rest of 2016 and beyond, you may be interested in reviewing the long-term horoscopes I wrote for you early this year. They discuss your best potential destiny for all of 2016. To see them, go here.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Visualize two versions of yourself, one male and one female, holding hands as they gaze into a reflection of the moon on a river. Keep an image of a sphinx with you at all times. Imagine you have a guardian angel who looks like Beyonce.

What do you want to be when you grow up, Capricorn? What? You say you are already all grown up, and my question is irrelevant? If that's your firm belief, I will ask you to set it aside for now. I'll invite you to entertain the possibility that maybe some parts of you are not in fact fully mature; that no matter how ripe you imagine yourself to be, you could become even riper -- an even more gorgeous version of your best self. I will also encourage you to immerse yourself in a mood of playful fun as you respond to the following question: "How can I activate and embody an even more complete version of my soul's code?"

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I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR BIG-PICTURE PREVIEW -- an audio report about YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2016."

What are your visions and plans for your life in the next ten to fifteen months? Could you use some inspiration as you mobilize your higher powers? Tune in. (The cost for either the weekly forecast or the long-term report is $6, with discounts for multiple purchases.)

You can also hear a shorter-term forecast for the week ahead by clicking on "This week (July 12, 2016)."

Whether or not you want to listen to those Big Picture audio reports for the rest of 2016 and beyond, you may be interested in reviewing the long-term horoscopes I wrote for you early this year. They discuss your best potential destiny for all of 2016. To see them, go here.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Review in painstaking detail the history of your life, honoring every moment as if you were conducting a benevolent Judgment Day. Forgive yourself of every mistake except one.

On a summer day 20 years ago, I took my five-year-old daughter Zoe and her friend Max to the merry-go-round in San Francisco's Golden Gate Park. Zoe jumped on the elegant golden-maned lion and Max mounted the wild blue horse. Me? I climbed aboard the humble pig. Its squat pink body didn't seem designed for rapid movement. Its timid gaze was fixed on the floor in front of it. As the man who operated the ride came around to see if everyone was in place, he congratulated me on my bold choice. Very few riders preferred the porker, he said. Not glamorous enough. "But I'm sure I will arrive at our destination as quickly and efficiently as everyone else," I replied. Your immediate future, Aquarius, has symbolic resemblances to this scene.

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I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR BIG-PICTURE PREVIEW -- an audio report about YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2016."

What are your visions and plans for your life in the next ten to fifteen months? Could you use some inspiration as you mobilize your higher powers? Tune in. (The cost for either the weekly forecast or the long-term report is $6, with discounts for multiple purchases.)

You can also hear a shorter-term forecast for the week ahead by clicking on "This week (July 12, 2016)."

Whether or not you want to listen to those Big Picture audio reports for the rest of 2016 and beyond, you may be interested in reviewing the long-term horoscopes I wrote for you early this year. They discuss your best potential destiny for all of 2016. To see them, go here.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Create a royal crown for yourself out of a shower cap, rubber bands, and light bulbs. Think of the last place on Earth you'd ever want to visit, and visualize yourself having fun there. Say these words and see how they feel: "Ever since I learned to see three sides to every story, I'm finding much better stories."

Early on in our work together, my psychotherapist confessed that she only works with clients whose problems are interesting to her. In part, her motivations are selfish: Her goal is to enjoy her work. But her motivations are also altruistic. She feels she's not likely to be of service to anyone with whom she can't be deeply engaged. I understand this perspective, and am inclined to make it more universal. Isn't it smart to pick all our allies according to this principle? Every one of us is a mess in one way or another, so why not choose to blend our fates with those whose messiness entertains us and teaches us the most? I suggest you experiment with this view in the coming weeks and months, Pisces.

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I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR BIG-PICTURE PREVIEW -- an audio report about YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2016."

What are your visions and plans for your life in the next ten to fifteen months? Could you use some inspiration as you mobilize your higher powers? Tune in. (The cost for either the weekly forecast or the long-term report is $6, with discounts for multiple purchases.)

You can also hear a shorter-term forecast for the week ahead by clicking on "This week (July 12, 2016)."

Whether or not you want to listen to those Big Picture audio reports for the rest of 2016 and beyond, you may be interested in reviewing the long-term horoscopes I wrote for you early this year. They discuss your best potential destiny for all of 2016. To see them, go here.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Exaggerate your flaws till they turn into virtues. Dream up wilder, wetter, more interesting problems. Change your name every day for a thousand days.