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Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny


Week of November 20th, 2014

♈ ARIES

(March 21-April 19)
Someone on Reddit.com posed the question, "What have you always been curious to try?" In reply, many people said they wanted to experiment with exotic varieties of sex and drugs they had never treated themselves to before. Other favorites: eating chocolate-covered bacon; piloting a plane; shoplifting; doing a stand-up comedy routine; hang-gliding and deep-sea diving; exploring the Darknet and the Deep Web; spontaneously taking a trip to a foreign country; turning away from modern society and joining a Buddhist monastery. What would your answer be, Aries? The coming weeks will be an excellent time to explore what you have always been curious to try. The risks will be lower than usual, and the results more likely to be interesting.

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Would you like to hear more about the hidden factors influencing your life? Do you want to uncover the secrets you've been hiding even from yourself? Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Imagine you're with a team of explorers in Antarctica. You're climbing the 2,000-foot granite spire called Rakekniven that thrusts up out of the ice in Queen Maud Land. The temperature is 10 degrees below zero. There's not a plant or animal in sight. The blinding white emptiness of the wasteland beneath you fills you with desolate reverence, alienated awe, and soaring gratitude. You are far from everything that normally gives you comfort. Why do you feel so good?

♉ TAURUS

(April 20-May 20)
Contrary to popular opinion, crime fiction author Arthur Conan Doyle never once had his character Sherlock Holmes utter the statement "Elementary, my dear Watson." For that matter, Humphrey Bogart never actually said "Play it again, Sam" in the film Casablanca. Star Trek's Captain Kirk never used the exact phrase "Beam me up, Scotty." Furthermore I, Rob Brezsny, have never before issued the following prophecy: "Deep sexy darkness and deep sexy brilliance are conspiring to bring you Tauruses intriguing pleasures that will educate the naive part of your soul" -- until now, that is. At this juncture in the ever-twisting plot of your life story, I am most definitely saying just that.

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Do you wish you could get more clarity about the foggy, ambiguous situations you're dealing with? Want more help in exploring the Great Mystery that is your life? I discuss your coming week in greater depth in your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Breathe more like a wild boar and less like a parakeet. Act more like an unfathomable game with no time limit and less like a puzzle with just a few last pieces missing. Shimmer more like the aurora borealis in the early morning sky and less like a furnace heating a mansion. See more like a panther sees and less like your first teacher. Write more fat messages in the mist on the glass, and speak less about the skinny facts you know by heart. Eat more magic cookies and less brain candy.

♊ GEMINI

(May 21-June 20)
Here are some thoughts from Gemini author Fernando Pessoa: "The feelings that hurt most, the emotions that sting most, are those that are absurd -- the longing for impossible things; nostalgia for what never was; the desire for what could have been; regret over not being someone else." Can you relate, Gemini? Have you felt those feelings? Here's the good news: In the coming weeks, you will be more free of them than you have been in a long time. What will instead predominate for you are yearnings for very possible things and contentment with what's actually available to you. (Pessoa's words are from The Book of Disquiet, translated by Alfred Mac Adam.)

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Do you want further explorations of the intriguing twists and turns of your personal evolution? Would you like help in solving the riddles that confuse you? Check out your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Try this meditation: Imagine that you are the wood and the fire that consumes the wood.

First, focus your awareness on the part of you that is the wood. You may tremble or gasp, feeling the jolt of your solidity disintegrating, your form changing. As you shift your attention to the part of you that is the fire, you may exult in the wild joy of power and liberation.

It may be tempting to favor the fire over the wood, to love the burning more than the being burned. But if you'd like to understand pronoia in its fullness, you've got to appreciate them equally. Can you imagine yourself being the fire and wood simultaneously? Is it possible for you to experience the deep pleasure of their collaboration?

♋ CANCERIAN

(June 21-July 22)
The most important thing you can do in the coming weeks is learn how to take care of yourself better. What? You say you're too busy for that? You have too many appointments and obligations? I disagree. In my astrological opinion, there's one task that must trump all others, and that is get smarter about how you eat, sleep, exercise, relax, heal yourself, and connect with people. I can assure you that there's a lot you don't know about what you really need and the best ways to get what you really need. But you are ripe to become wiser in this subtle, demanding, and glorious art.

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Need more help in figuring out the questions life is asking you? Crave more support in your efforts to build your courage? Check out your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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One of life's bounties is its changeableness, which ensures that boredom will never last very long. You may underestimate the intensity of your longing for continual transformation, but the universe doesn't. That's why it provides you with the boundless entertainment of your ever-shifting story. That's why it is always revising the challenges it sends your way, providing your curious soul with a rich variety of unpredictable teachings.

Neuroscientists have turned up evidence that suggests you love this aspect of the universe's behavior. They say that you are literally addicted to learning. At the moment when you grasp a lesson you've been grappling with, your brain experiences a rush of a natural opium-like chemical, boosting your pleasure levels. You crave this experience. You thrive on it.

♌ LEO

(July 23-August 22)
Naturalist Greg Munson says that many dragonflies are great acrobats. They are the "Cirque du Soleil" performers of the animal kingdom. Not only do they eat in mid-air, they also have sex. While flying, two dragonflies will hook up and bend into a roughly circular formation to accommodate the idiosyncrasies of their reproductive organs, thereby forming a "mating pinwheel." I don't expect you to achieve quite that level of virtuosity in your own amorous escapades, Leo. But if you're adventurous, you could very well enjoy experiences that resemble having sex while flying.

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What fresh blessings will life bring you? What questions should you be asking? To explore the ripening trends further, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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The phrase "new roses" can serve as an antidote to neurosis -- as a kind of magical spell. You might invoke it when you're in danger of getting undermined by either your own neurosis or someone else's.

If you notice, for instance, that your subconscious mind is spiraling down into a sour fantasy stirred up by one of your habitual fears, you could mutter a cheerful round of "new roses, new roses, new roses."

If your allies slip into the same compulsive behavior that they tend to get stuck in whenever stress overflows, you could chant "new roses, new roses, new roses" in a tuneful, affectionate tone.

♍ VIRGO

(August 23-September 22)
Born under the sign of Virgo, Yuriy Norshteyn is a Russian animator who has won numerous awards. His Tale of Tales was once voted the greatest animated film of all time. But he hasn't finished any new films for quite a while. In fact, he has been working on the same project since 1981, indulging his perfectionism to the max. In 33 years, he has only finished 25 minutes' worth of The Overcoat, which is based on a story by Nikolai Gogol. But I predict that he will complete this labor of love in the next eight months -- just as many of you other Virgos will finally wrap up tasks you have been working on for a long time.

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Want to explore this chapter of your life story even further? Dig deeper? Push harder? Consider tuning in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Thousands of things go right for you every day, beginning the moment you wake up. Through some magic you don't fully understand, you're still breathing and your heart is beating, even though you've been unconscious for many hours. The air is a mix of gases that's just right for your body's needs, as it was before you fell asleep.

You can see! Light of many colors floods into your eyes, registered by nerves that took God or evolution or some process millions of years to perfect. The interesting gift of these vivid hues is made possible by an unimaginably immense globe of fire, the sun, which continually detonates nuclear reactions in order to convert its own body into light and heat and energy for your personal use.

♎ LIBRA

(September 23-October 22)
"Every saint has a bee in his halo," said philosopher Elbert Hubbard. Similarly, some Libras have a passive-aggressive streak hidden beneath their harmony-seeking, peace-loving persona. Are you one of them? If so, I invite you to express your darker feelings more forthrightly. You don't have to be mean and insensitive. In fact, it's best if you use tact and diplomacy. Just make sure you reveal the fact that there is indeed a bee in your halo. I bet you will ultimately be pleased with the consequences you stir up through your acts of courageous honesty.

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You're got more strength and intelligence than you realize. For help in accessing those untapped inner resources, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Dear Beauty and Truth Lab: I was wondering if you had any information about Beyonders, people who were born under no star and who are therefore not ruled by the stars. - Wannabe Beyonder

Dear Wannabe: It's impossible to be born under no star. However, we all go through periods when we're relatively free from the authority of the stars we were born under and therefore immune from cosmic compulsion. During these times, we're less susceptible to the whims of fate and the demands of the past and the inertia of karma. Our willpower has more breathing room, and we're more likely to fulfill Einstein's dictum, "Imagination is more important than knowledge.

♏ SCORPIO

(October 23-November 21)
Many people use the terms "cement" and "concrete" interchangeably, but they are not the same. Cement is powdery stuff that's composed of limestone, gypsum, clay with alumino-silicate, and other ingredients. It's just one of the raw materials that is used to make concrete -- usually no more than 15 percent of the total mass. The rest consists of sand, crushed stone, and water. Let's regard this as a good metaphor for you to keep in mind, Scorpio. If you want to create a durable thing that can last as long as concrete, make sure you don't get overly preoccupied with the "cement" at the expense of the other 85 percent of the stuff you will need.

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How are you going to change what needs to be changed and accept what needs to be accepted? To get some support from me, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Of the many things that have gone right for you during your time on Earth, the most crucial was your birth. As you crossed over the threshold, trading the warm dark sanctuary for the bright noisy enigma, you didn't die! It was a difficult act of high magic that involved many people who worked very hard in your behalf. The skills they provided in helping you navigate your rite of passage were in turn made possible by previous generations of threshold-tenders who bequeathed their expertise.

Months before that initiation, a more secret miracle bloomed: Your life began as a single cell, spawned by the explosive fusion of two highly specialized bundles of chromosomes. How could that tiny package of raw material have possibly grown a brain and liver and heart and stomach over a period of a few months? What inscrutable genius guided and oversaw the emergence of your fully formed infant body, that virtuoso creation, from the slimmest of clues?

♐ SAGITTARIUS

(November 22-December 21)
"Whatever returns from oblivion returns to find a voice," writes Louise Glück in her poem "The Wild Iris." I think that will be a key theme for you in the coming weeks. There's a part of you that is returning from oblivion -- making its way home from the abyss -- and it will be hungry to express itself when it arrives back here in your regularly scheduled life. This dazed part of you may not yet know what exactly it wants to say. But it is fertile with the unruly wisdom it has gathered while wandering. Sooner rather than later, it will discover a way to articulate its raw truths.

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Sometimes it's a challenge to try to figure out what's important and what's not important. If you'd like more of my input, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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You can drink a glass of water. You can spread butter on a slice of toast. You can wash your hair and prune your plants and draw infinity signs on a piece of paper. Your hands work wonderfully well! Their intricate force and sustained grace are amply supported by your heart, which circulates your blood all the way out to replenish the energy of the muscles and nerves in your fingers and palms and wrists. After your blood has delivered its blessings, it finds its way back to your heart to be refreshed. This masterful mystery repeats itself over and over again without you ever having to think about it.

♑ CAPRICORN

(December 22-January 19)
"There is no revenge so complete as forgiveness," said American humorist Josh Billings. I propose that we make that your motto in the coming weeks. It's an excellent time to liberate yourself from memories that still cause you pain -- to garner major healing from past anguish and upheaval. And one of the best ways to do that will be to let go of as much blame and rage and hatred as you possibly can. Forgiveness can be your magic spell.

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How well is your imagination working these days? Could it use a boost? A prod? A jolt of inspiration? Try tuning in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Your imagination may be the best gift you've been given. It's the source of your creative power. If there's a particular experience or object you want to bring into your life, the first thing you've got to do is visualize it. The practical actions you take to manifest your dreams always refer back to the pictures in your mind's eye. And so every goal you fulfill, every quest you carry out, begins as an inner vision. Your imagination is the engine of your destiny. It's the catalyst with which you design your future. Do you know where it comes from? Do you have any idea how powerful it is?

♒ AQUARIUS

(January 20- February 18)
Denmark has been a pioneer in developing the technology to supply its energy needs with wind power. By 2020, it expects to generate half of its electricity from wind turbines. Recently the Danish climate minister also announced his nation's intention to phase out the use of coal as an energy source within ten years. I would love to see you apply this kind of enlightened long-term thinking to your own personal destiny, Aquarius. Now would be an excellent time to brainstorm about the life you want to be living in 2020 and 2025. It's also a perfect moment to outline a master plan for the next ten years, and commit to it.

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Want more clues? Need further insight? For more evocative questions and pithy suggestions about your unfolding destiny, check out your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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May you eat an unfamiliar dessert in a strange land at least once every three years.

May you wake up to salsa music one summer morning and start dancing while you're still half-­asleep.

May you spray-paint Rilke poems as graffiti on highway overpasses.

May you mix stripes with plaids, floral patterns with checks, and yellowish-green with brownish-purple.

May you learn to identify by name 20 flowers, 15 trees, 10 clouds and one extrasolar planet.

May you put a bumper sticker on your car or bike that says, "My god can kick your god's ass!"

If you bury your face in your tear-stained pillow and beg God to please send you your soul mate, may you not slur your words in such a way that they sound like "cell mate."

May you dream of taking a trip to the moon in a gondola powered by firecrackers and wild swans.

May you actually kiss the earth now and then.

May you find many good excuses to say, as physicist Niels Bohr once did, "Your theory is crazy, but it's not crazy enough to be true."

♓ PISCES

(February 19-March 20)
Piscean actor Sir Michael Caine has had an illustrious career. He has won two Oscars and been nominated for the award six times in five different decades. But for his appearance in Jaws: The Revenge, he was nominated for the Golden Raspberry Award for Worst Supporting Actor. He confessed that his work in that film was not his best, and yet he was happy with how much money he made doing it. "I have never seen the film," he said, "but by all accounts it was terrible. However, I have seen the house that it built, and it is terrific." In accordance with the astrological omens, Pisces, you have permission to engage in a comparable trade-off during the coming months.

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How much do you want to know about your life? How far do you dare to go in your quest for self-mastery? For more insight into your intriguing fate, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Have you ever been loved? I bet you have been loved so much and so deeply that you have become blasé about the enormity of the grace it confers. So let me remind you: To be loved is a privilege and prize equivalent to being born. If you're smart, you pause regularly to bask in the astonishing knowledge that there are many people out there who care for you and want you to thrive and hold you in their thoughts with fondness.

Animals, too: You have been the recipient of their boundless affection. The spirits of allies who've left this world continue to send their tender regards, as well. Do you "believe" in angels and other divine beings? Whether or not you do, I can assure you that there are hordes of them beaming their uncanny consecrations your way. You are awash in torrents of love.


Listen to Rob's Expanded Audio Horoscopes, updated weekly.



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