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Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny

Week of September 11th, 2014


(May 21-June 20)
If you go to a 7-Eleven convenience store and order a Double Big Gulp drink, you must be prepared to absorb 40 teaspoons of sugar. But what will be an even greater challenge to your body is the sheer amount of fluid you will have to digest: 50 ounces. The fact is, your stomach can't easily accommodate more than 32 ounces at a time. It's true that if you sip the Double Big Gulp very slowly -- like for a period of three and a half hours -- the strain on your system will be less. But after the first half hour, as the beverage warms up, its taste will decline steeply. Everything I've just said should serve as a useful metaphor for you in the coming week. Even if you are very sure that the stuff you want to introduce into your life is healthier for you than a Double Big Gulp, don't get more of it than you can comfortably hold.


Where do you want to go? Who do you want to be? For more clues, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.


SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
Elijah, the beer truck driver who lives in the trailer with old tires, rusty tools, and the husk of a 1975 Chevy El Camino littering the driveway, tells me that everything he knows about God can be summed up in the bumper sticker on the back of the El Camino, which reads "Theresa and Johnny's Comfort Food -- Live Free or Die."

Mythologist Joseph Campbell, on the other hand, suggested we should imagine a deity to be like a floating ball of fire that would immediately kill anyone it touched.

Then there's the poet Rumi. He envisioned God as your tender Best Friend and Unpredictable Ally who's always as close as your own breath.

Which version do you prefer?