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Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny


Week of August 21st, 2014

♑ CAPRICORN

(December 22-January 19)
Do you know what phase of your cycle it is? Here are a few hints. It doesn't come around often. It's not characterized by predictable events or boring certainties. And it may allow you, even encourage you, to take a break from being your usual self. Give up? OK. I'll tell you. You have entered the Nicholas Cage Phase of your cycle. Cage is a Capricorn, but not a typical one. He's eccentric and manic and certifiably batty. He refers to his acting technique as "Nouveau Shamanic," once lived in a fake castle, and owns a Lamborghini that belonged to the legendary tyrant, the Shah of Iran. For our current purposes, he has also testified, "I am not a demon. I am a lizard, a shark, a heat-seeking panther. I want to be Bob Denver on acid playing the accordion."

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What exactly are you looking for? How would you describe the experiences you want more than anything else? It's possible my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE could give you additional help in figuring that out.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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"You may enjoy this movie if you shut down enough brain cells. I turned off all except the ones needed to remember where I parked my car." This observation comes from a critic's evaluation of Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle, but I've read similar comments in many reviews of other films and entertainment. Indeed, it's an approach that many intelligent people employ routinely in response to the shiny slop our culture offers up.

What about you? Do you assume you have to make yourself dumber in order to have fun? Has the well-crafted inanity of the world caused you to shut down your sensitivity? Work to reverse this trend. You'll receive help from unexpected sources if you do.