Your power animal is not the soaring eagle or the shrewd wolf or the brave bear. No, Taurus, it's the rubber chicken. I'm serious. With the rubber chicken as your guardian spirit, you might be inspired to commit random acts of goofiness and surrealism. And that would reduce tension in the people around you. It could motivate you to play jokes and pull harmless pranks that influence everyone to take themselves less seriously. Are you willing to risk losing your dignity if it helps make the general mood looser and more generous? Nothing could be better for group solidarity, which is crucial these days. (Thanks, Gina Williams.)

You can learn to be lucky. It's not a mystical force you're born with, but a habit you can develop. How? For starters, be open to new experiences, trust your gut wisdom, expect good fortune, see the bright side of challenging events, and master the art of maximizing serendipitous opportunities. For more help, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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On the downside, your addiction diverts your energy from a deeper desire that it superficially resembles. For instance, if you're an alcoholic, your urge to get loaded may be an inferior substitute for and a poor imitation of your buried longing to commune with spirit.

On the upside, your addiction is your ally, because it dares you to get strong and smart enough to wrestle free of its grip; it pushes you to summon the uncanny willpower necessary to defeat the darkness within you that saps your ability to follow the path with heart.

(P.S. Don't tell me you have no addictions. Each of us is addicted to some sensation, feeling, thought, or action, if not to an actual substance.)

Extol your sublime, painful addiction -- celebrate it to death. Ride it, spank it, kiss it, whip it.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.