According to April Winchell's book Regretsy: Where DIY Meets WTF, here are some of the treasures you can find for sale at Etsy.com: a toy pig made from a root beer can; a "juicy enchanted pouch" for holding runes; a handmade hornet's nest; a stuffed feral goat fashioned to resemble a unicorn; fake tapeworms that are actually spray-painted fettucine; and a "haunted Ouija board Las Vegas casino-style blackjack roulette poker chip." I would absolutely love it if you designed something like this and hawked it on Etsy, Gemini. Your skill as an idiosyncratic creator will soon be peaking, as will your capacity for marketing the most unique aspects of your shtick and style.

Need more help deciphering the riddles and enigmas that are fueling your amazing story? Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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HELP WANTED. Practical dreamers with high emotional intelligence needed to become experts in the following subjects: the art of possessing abundant resources without feeling greed or a sense of superiority; the science of cultivating luxurious comfort in a way that does not lead to spiritual sloth; and a knack for enjoying peace and serenity without diluting one's ambition.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.