During the skunk mating season, two robust members of the species made the crawl space beneath my house their trysting place. The result was spectacular. Siren-like squalls rose from their ecstasy, spiraling up into my kitchen accompanied by plumes of a stench that I imagined the Italian poet Dante, in his book The Inferno, might have identified as native to the ninth level of hell. Being as instinctively empathic as I am, I naturally appreciated how much delight the creatures were enjoying. At the same time, I wished they would take their revelry elsewhere. So I called on the Humane Society, an animal rescue group, to flush them out without harming them. If anything resembling this scenario takes place in your sphere, Cancerian -- if someone's pursuit of happiness cramps your style -- I suggest you adopt my gentle but firm approach.

Would you like to hear me say some more about your ever-evolving destiny? Check out your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
Robert Anton Wilson defined information as data and ideas that are new to you. If it's something you already know, then it's propaganda or dogma, not information.

Terence McKenna had a similar view. He used the terms "information" and "novelty" interchangeably. If you're not surprised, he said, if your curiosity isn't piqued, then the messages streaming your way don't qualify as information.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.