In the coming weeks, life will beguile you with secrets and riddles but probably not reveal as much as you'd like. I think this is an opportunity, not a problem. In my opinion, your task isn't to press for shiny clarity, but rather to revel in the luxuriant mysteries. Let them confer their blessings on you through the magic of teasing and tantalizing. And what is the nature of those blessings? To enlighten your irrational mind, stimulate your imagination, teach you patience, and nurture your connection with eternity.

How are you going to change what needs to be changed and accept what needs to be accepted? To get some support from me, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. Meanwhile, to get a taste of what my audio offerings are like, listen to my free podcast, You Are a Prophet.

*

SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
Thank your mother for the pain she endured while birthing you.

For three minutes on the first Friday of every month, close your eyes and imagine yourself riding a wild horse through a cemetery.

Fantasize that your so-called "dark side" is sweet and creamy.

When you come home after a day of triumphs, take out the garbage.

Dream you're a red-tailed hawk soaring over a shopping mall.

Forgive yourself for the blindness that put you in the path of those who betrayed you.

Buy seven used gowns worn to the Academy Awards show by famous actresses, and send them gratis to seven Guatemalan teenagers.

Visualize two versions of yourself, one male and one female, holding hands as they gaze into a reflection of the moon on a river.

Keep an image of a sphinx with you at all times.
*
The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

Butterflies recall at least some of what they've learned during their time as caterpillars. The metamorphosis they go through is dramatic, turning their bodies into a soupy goo before remaking them into winged gliders. And yet they retain the gist of the lessons they mastered while in their earlier form. I see something comparable ahead for you in 2011, Taurus. It's as if you will undergo a kind of reincarnation without having to endure the inconvenience of actually dying. Like a butterfly, the wisdom you've earned in your old self will accompany you into your new life. Are you ready? The process begins soon.

Sometimes it's a challenge to try to figure out what's important and what's not important. If you'd like more of my input, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. Meanwhile, to get a taste of what my audio offerings are like, listen to my free podcast, You Are a Prophet.

*

SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
You're a star -- and so am I. I'm a genius -- and so are you. Your success encourages my brilliance, and my charisma enhances your power. Your victory doesn't require my defeat, and vice versa. Those are the rules in the New World -- quite unlike the rules in the Old World, where zero-sum games are the norm, and only one of us can win each time we play.

In the New World, you don't have to tone down or apologize for your prowess, because you love it when other people shine. You exult in your own excellence without regarding it as a sign of inherent superiority. As you ripen more and more of your latent aptitude, you inspire the rest of us to claim our own idiosyncratic magnificence.
*
The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

What nourishes you emotionally and spiritually, Gemini? I'm not talking about what entertains you or flatters you or takes your mind off your problems. I'm referring to the influences that make you stronger and the people who see you for who you really are and the situations that teach you life-long lessons. I mean the beauty that replenishes your psyche and the symbols that consistently restore your balance and the memories that keep feeding your ability to rise to each new challenge. Take inventory of these precious assets. And then make a special point of nurturing them back.

How well is your imagination working these days? Could it use a boost? A prod? A jolt of inspiration? Try tuning in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. Meanwhile, to get a taste of what my audio offerings are like, listen to my free podcast, You Are a Prophet.

*

SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
At the heart of the pronoiac way of life is an apparent conundrum: You can have anything you want if you'll just ask for it in an unselfish way. The trick to making this work is to locate where your deepest ambition coincides with the greatest gift you have to give. Figure out exactly how the universe, by providing you with abundance, can improve the lot of everyone whose life you touch. Seek the fulfillment of your fondest desires in such a way that you become a fount of blessings.
*
The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

Two-thirds of American elementary-school teachers spend their own money to buy food for their poor students. Meanwhile, there's a 50 percent chance that an American kid will, at some point in his or her young life, resort to using government aid in the form of food stamps. Those facts make me angry and motivate me to volunteer to distribute free food at the local food bank. I encourage you, my fellow Cancerian, to summon your own good reasons to get riled up in behalf of people who have less luck and goodness than you do. It's always therapeutic to stretch your generosity and spread your wealth, but doing so will especially redound to your advantage in the coming weeks. Unselfish acts will bring profound selfish benefits.

Want more clues? Need further insight? For more evocative questions and pithy suggestions about your unfolding destiny, check out your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. Meanwhile, to get a taste of what my audio offerings are like, listen to my free podcast, You Are a Prophet.

*

SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
You want hot gold secrets to ripen in your dark candy soul? Then study the ocean's electricity for its teachings about moon victories. Extract a fresh green why from the book of storms you never actually read as a child.

Then, when the lilies' clouds soar over your shadow, your listening will grow tougher and wetter. When the night's chanting sky reveals the birth memories that even time had forgotten, you'll know exactly how to look through the sun to the other side of your best fear.
*
The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

According to some sources, the ancient Greek philosopher Socrates practiced the art of sculpture as a young man. But he abandoned it early on, deciding that he wanted to "carve his soul rather than marble." Can I interest you in turning your attention to that noble, gritty task, Leo? It would be a fine time to do some intensive soul-carving. Soul-scouring, too, would be both fun and wise, as well as soul-etching and soul-emblazoning and soul-accessorizing. I highly recommend that you enjoy a prolonged phase of renovating and replenishing your most precious work of art.

How much do you want to know about your life? How far do you dare to go in your quest for self-mastery? For more insight into your intriguing fate, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. Meanwhile, to get a taste of what my audio offerings are like, listen to my free podcast, You Are a Prophet.

*

SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
Robert Anton Wilson defined information as data and ideas that are new to you. If it's something you already know, then it's propaganda or dogma, not information.

Terence McKenna had a similar view. He used the terms "information" and "novelty" interchangeably. If you're not surprised, he said, if your curiosity isn't piqued, then the messages streaming your way don't qualify as information.
*
The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

In her haunting tune "One Blood," Virgo singer Lila Downs confesses that "the deepest fear [is] my desire." I personally know many Virgos who make a similar lament. How about you? Is there any way in which you are scared of the power of your longing? Do you ever find yourself reluctant to unleash the full force of your passion, worried that it could drive you out of control or lead you astray? If so, the coming weeks will be prime time to face down your misgivings. It's time to liberate your desires, at least a little.

Would you like to hear more about the hidden factors influencing your life? Do you want to uncover the secrets you've been hiding even from yourself? Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. Meanwhile, to get a taste of what my audio offerings are like, listen to my free podcast, You Are a Prophet.

*

SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
Having ridden my mountain bike through Marin County's hills for years, I've watched the central shrine, Mt. Tamalpais, go through thousands of changes. Depending on the weather, the season, and the time of day, it has been a different event on each occasion I've seen it. When the low-slung sun illuminates the thin layer of mist covering it late on a winter afternoon, it's not the same mountain that lies beneath a full moon beaming down on it through a hole in the streaming clouds on a summer night.

The realist in me says I'd be justified in giving it a new name each time I'm in its presence.
*
The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

Here are your words of power: hybrid, amalgamation, composite, aggregate, medley, alloy, ensemble. Now here are your words of disempowerment: welter, mishmash, jumble, hodgepodge, patchwork. Strive to accentuate the first category and avoid the second. Your task is to create a pleasing, synergetic arrangement from a multiplicity of factors, even as you avoid throwing together a hash of diverse influences into an unholy mess. Be calculating and strategic, not rash and random, as you do your blending.

Do you wish you could get more clarity about the foggy, ambiguous situations you're dealing with? Want more help in exploring the Great Mystery that is your life? I discuss your coming week in greater depth in your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. Meanwhile, to get a taste of what my audio offerings are like, listen to my free podcast, You Are a Prophet.

*

SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
In her book Women Who Run with the Wolves, Clarissa Pinkola Estes suggests that we all need to periodically go cheerfully and enthusiastically out of our minds. Make sure, she says, that at least one part of you always remains untamed, uncategorizable, and unsubjugated by routine. Be adamant in your determination to stay intimately connected to all that's inexplicable and mysterious about your life.

At the same time, though, Estes believes you need to keep your unusual urges clear and ordered. Discipline your wildness, in other words, and don't let it degenerate into careless disorder.
*
The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

On my Facebook page,I posted this excerpt from a Pablo Neruda love poem (translated by Stephen Tapscott): "Our love is like a well in the wilderness where time watches over the wandering lightning. Our sleep is a secret tunnel that leads to the scent of apples carried on the wind." In response, a reader named John F. Gamboa said this: "I once found a well in the desert. There was a rope and a bucket. The bucket had a small hole in it. While pulling up the bucket of water, about half of it drained. But I suppose a decent bucket would have been stolen. So a bucket with a small hole was perfect; I got what I needed!" I'm here to tell you, Scorpio, that like Gamboa, a bucket with a small hole is probably what you need right now.

Do you want further explorations of the intriguing twists and turns of your personal evolution? Would you like help in solving the riddles that confuse you? Check out your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. Meanwhile, to get a taste of what my audio offerings are like, listen to my free podcast, You Are a Prophet.

*

SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
"The real secret of magic is that the world is made of words," said Terence McKenna in Alien Dreamtime, "and that if you know the words that the world is made of, you can make of it whatever you wish." Here's my version of that hypothesis: What world you end up living in depends at least in part on your use of language.

Do you want to move and breathe amidst infertile chaos where nothing makes sense and no one really loves anyone? Then speak with unconscious carelessness, expressing yourself lazily. Constantly materialize and entertain angry thoughts in the privacy of your own imagination, beaming silent curses out into eternity.

Or would you prefer to live in a realm that's rich with fluid epiphanies and intriguing coincidences and mysterious harmonies? Then be discerning and inventive in how you speak, primed to name the unexpected codes that are always being born right in front of your eyes. Turn your imagination into an ebullient laboratory where the somethings you create out of nothings are tinctured with the secret light you see in your dreams of invisible fire.
*
The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

You've arrived at a delicate yet boisterous turning point when one-of-a-kind opportunities are budding. I'm going to give you seven phrases that I think capture the essence of this pregnant moment: 1. wise innocence; 2. primal elegance; 3. raw holiness; 4. electrifying poise; 5. curative teasing; 6. rigorous play; 7 volcanic tenderness. To maximize your ability to capitalize on the transformations that are available, I suggest you seek out and cultivate these seemingly paradoxical states of being.

Need more help in figuring out the questions life is asking you? Crave more support in your efforts to build your courage? Check out your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. Meanwhile, to get a taste of what my audio offerings are like, listen to my free podcast, You Are a Prophet.

*

SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
Is there really such a thing as free will, or are our destinies shaped by forces beyond our control?

Here's one way to think about that question: Maybe some people actually have more free will than others. Not because they have more money. (Many rich folks are under the spell of their instincts, after all.) Not because they have high-status positions. (A boss may have power over others but little power over himself.)

Rather, those with a lot of free will have earned that privilege by taking strong measures to dissolve the conditioning they absorbed while growing up. They've acted on the advice of psychologist Carl Jung: "Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate."
*
The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

For years I've had recurring dreams of finding treasure amidst trash. I interpret this to mean that I should always be alert, in my waking life, for the possibility that I might come across beautiful or valuable stuff that's mixed in with what has been discarded or forgotten. Recently I heard about a literal embodiment of this theme. A sewage treatment plant in Japan announced that it has been culling huge amounts of gold from the scum and slop -- so much so that their haul outstrips the yield at the country's top gold mine. I urge you to make this your metaphor of the week, Capricorn. What riches might you be able to pluck out of the dirt and shadows?

What fresh blessings will life bring you? What questions should you be asking? To explore the ripening trends further, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. Meanwhile, to get a taste of what my audio offerings are like, listen to my free podcast, You Are a Prophet.

*

SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
In 1971, astronaut Edgar Mitchell was the sixth person to walk on the moon. Since then he has cultivated an interest in matters that hard-core fundamentalist materialists like to call "the paranormal."

He once asked Buddhist lama Norbu Chen to attempt a psychic healing of his mother, who was legally blind. Norbu's magic worked. Mom's sight returned, and she was ecstatic.

A few days later, however, she made a discovery that horrified her: Norbu wasn't a Christian like she was. "My mother believed that if such healing didn't come from a Christian," says Mitchell, "then it must come from Satan, and she didn't want to be healed by Satan."

She soon had a dramatic relapse, completely losing the gift Norbu had bestowed. (Source: Kindred Spirit magazine, Summer 1997)
*
The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

Should you store up your energy, postpone your gratification, and withhold your full intensity for a more opportune time? Hell, no! Should you await further data before making a definitive conclusion, fantasize dreamily about some more perfect future, and retreat into a self-protective cocoon? Double hell, no! And if thoughts like those have been poking up into your awareness, exorcise them immediately. It is high time for you to grab the best goodies, reveal the whole truth, and employ your ultimate schemes. You are primed to make a big play, call on all the help you've been promised, and transform the "what ifs" into "no doubts."

Want to explore this chapter of your life story even further? Dig deeper? Push harder? Consider tuning in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES. Meanwhile, to get a taste of what my audio offerings are like, listen to my free podcast, You Are a Prophet.

*

SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
The bumper sticker I saw said, "Having abandoned my search for the truth, I'm now looking for a good fantasy." Though it's meant to be sarcastic, it's a useful piece of advice.

Consider this hypothesis: The truth is so complicated and ever-shifting that it's impossible to pin down. Why try to understand the nature of reality when it's more productive and interesting to aggressively create the nature of reality? Why be preoccupied with conjuring up concepts to approximate the structure of the universe when the point is that we change everything we observe merely by looking at it?

As another bumper sticker says, "Life isn't about finding yourself. It's about creating yourself."
*
The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

In Taio Cruz's mega-hit pop song "Dynamite," he describes how excited he is to go dancing at his favorite nightclub. "I throw my hands up in the air," he exults. "I wanna celebrate and live my life . . . I'm wearin' all my favorite brands." In advising you about the best ways to ride the current cosmic rhythms, Pisces, I'll use Cruz as both a role model and an anti-role model. You should be like him in the sense of being eager to throw your hands up in the air. Right now it's your sacred duty to intensify your commitment to revelry and find every possible excuse to celebrate your life. On the other hand, it's crucial that you don't wear all your favorite brands. To get the full benefits from this time of festive release, you will need, as much as humanly possible, to declare your independence from corporate brainwashing and escape the intelligence-sapping mindset of consumerism.

You're got more strength and intelligence than you realize. For help in accessing those untapped inner resources, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. Meanwhile, to get a taste of what my audio offerings are like, listen to my free podcast, You Are a Prophet.

*

SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
Discordianism is one of the rare religions that takes account of Ralph Abraham's assertion that heart physiologists find more chaos in the healthy heart than in the sick heart. Here's a sampling of Discordian tenets. 1. Everyone is a saint, especially you. 2. Meditation consists primarily of cruising around looking for good luck. 3. Eating hot dog buns is prohibited, except on Friday, when it's compulsory. 4. When you're stuck in a rut, you must speak in tongues, handle snakes, and experience phantasmagoria. 5. Your guardian angel loves you better when your room is a mess. 6. Bowling alleys are sacred; you must protect them from ­desecration. 7. The Goddess will solve all your problems if you solve all hers.
*
The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.