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Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny


Week of January 28th, 2010

♈ ARIES

(March 21-April 19)
Shakespeare got modest respect while he was alive, but his reputation as a brilliant bard didn't gel right away. It wasn't until almost 50 years after he died that anyone thought his life and work were notable enough to write about. By then, all his colleagues and compatriots were gone, unable to testify. He himself left little information to build a biography around. That's why next to nothing is known about the person who made such a dramatic impact on the English language and literature. I suggest you take this as a metaphorical prod that will inspire you not to be blasé about the greatness that is in your vicinity. Don't take superlative intelligence, talent, or love for granted. Recognize it, bless it, be influenced by it.


You can still listen to my long-range, in-depth explorations of your destiny in 2010. Each report in the three-part series of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES is about 6-9 minutes long. A new short-term forecast for this week is also available. Sign in to access the 'scopes here.

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"The Eskimos had 52 names for snow because it was important to them," wrote novelist Margaret Atwood. "There ought to be as many for love."

Here are a few that the ancient Greeks devised, according to Lindsay Swope in her review of Richard Idemon's book Through the Looking Glass.

Epithemia is the basic need to touch and be touched. Our closest approximation is "horniness," though epithemia is not so much a sexual feeling as a sensual one.

Philia is friendship. It includes the need to admire and respect your friends as a reflection of yourself—like in high school, where you want to hang out with the cool kids because that means you're cool too.

Eros isn't sexual in the way we usually think, but is more about the emotional gratification that comes from merging souls.

Agape is a mature, utterly free expression of love that has no possessiveness. It means wanting the best for another person even if it doesn't advance your self-interest.

Your assignment is to coin three additional new words for love, which means you'll have to discover or create three alternate states of love that have previously been unnamed. To do that, you'll have to put aside your habitual expectations and standard definitions of what constitutes love so that you can explore an array of nuances, including varieties you never imagined existed.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♉ TAURUS

(April 20-May 20)
You are the lord of all you survey! I swear to God! I'm almost tempted to say that you now have the power to command whirlwinds and alter the course of mighty rivers! At the very least you will be able to mobilize the ambition of everyone you encounter and brighten the future of every group you're part of! Act with confident precision, Taurus! Speak with crisp authority! Your realm waits expectantly for the transformative decisions that will issue from the fresh depths of your emotional intelligence!


You can still listen to my long-range, in-depth explorations of your destiny in 2010. Each report in the three-part series of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES is about 6-9 minutes long. A new short-term forecast for this week is also available. Sign in to access the 'scopes here.

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Write the following on a piece of red paper and keep it under your pillow. "I, [put your name here], do solemnly swear on this day, [put date here], that I will devote myself for a period of seven days to learning my most important desire. No other thought will be more uppermost in my mind. No other concern will divert me from tracking down every clue that might assist me in my drive to ascertain the one experience in this world that deserves my brilliant passion above all others."
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♊ GEMINI

(May 21-June 20)
It's time for you to fly away -- to flee the safe pleasures that comfort you as well as the outmoded fixations that haunt you; to escape at least one of the galling compromises that twists your spirit as well as a familiar groove that numbs your intelligence. In my astrological opinion, Gemini, you need to get excited by stimuli that come from outside your known universe. You need fertile surprises that motivate you to resort to unpredictable solutions.


You can still listen to my long-range, in-depth explorations of your destiny in 2010. Each report in the three-part series of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES is about 6-9 minutes long. A new short-term forecast for this week is also available. Sign in to access the 'scopes here.

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Robin Norwood's self-help book Women Who Love Too Much deals with a theme that has gotten a lot of play in recent decades: If you're too generous to someone who doesn't appreciate it and at the expense of your own needs, you can make yourself sick.

An alternative perspective comes from philosopher Blaise Pascal, who said, "When one does not love too much, one does not love enough." He was primarily addressing psychologically healthy altruists, but it's a fertile ideal for pronoia lovers to keep in mind.

Decide whether you need to move more in the direction of Norwood's or Pascal's advice. Develop a game plan to carry out your resolve, then take action.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♋ CANCERIAN

(June 21-July 22)
"I never meet anyone who admits to having had a happy childhood," said writer Jessamyn West. "Everyone appears to think happiness betokens a lack of sensitivity." I agree, and go further. Many creative people I know actually brag about how messed up their early life was, as if that was a crucial ingredient in turning them into the geniuses they are today. Well, excuse me for breaking the taboo, but I, Rob Brezsny, had a happy childhood, and it did not prevent me from becoming a sensitive artist. In fact, it helped. Now I ask you, my fellow Cancerian, whether you're brave enough to go against the grain and confess that your early years had some wonderful moments? You're in a phase of your cycle when recalling the beauty and joy of the past could be profoundly invigorating.


You can still listen to my long-range, in-depth explorations of your destiny in 2010. Each report in the three-part series of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES is about 6-9 minutes long. A new short-term forecast for this week is also available. Sign in to access the 'scopes here.

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A common obstruction to a vital intimate relationship is what I call the assumption of clairvoyance. You imagine, perhaps unconsciously, that your partner or friend is somehow magically psychic when it comes to you -- so much so that he or she should unfailingly intuit exactly what you need, even if you don't ask for it. This fantasy may seem romantic, but it can sink the most promising alliances.

To counteract any tendencies you might have to indulge in the assumption of clairvoyance, practice stating your desires aloud.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♌ LEO

(July 23-August 22)
Usually I overflow with advice about how to access your soul's code. I love to help you express the unique blueprint that sets you apart from everyone else. Every now and then, though, it's a healing balm to take a sabbatical from exploring the intricacies of your core truths. This is one of those times. For the next ten days, I invite you to enjoy the privilege of being absolutely nobody. Revel in the pure emptiness of having no clue about your deep identity. If anyone asks you, "Who are you?", relish the bubbly freedom that comes from cheerfully saying, "I have no freaking idea!"


You can still listen to my long-range, in-depth explorations of your destiny in 2010. Each report in the three-part series of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES is about 6-9 minutes long. A new short-term forecast for this week is also available. Sign in to access the 'scopes here.

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Even if your heart's not exactly shattered at the moment, it has no doubt been so at some time in the past. I invite you to feel a wave of sadness about your suffering, then move on to this possibility: that having a broken heart is one of the best things that can happen to you.

Why? Because it strengthens your humility, which makes you smarter. It demonstrates to you that you have a tremendous capacity for deep feelings -- far more than you're normally aware of. It breaks down defense mechanisms that have desensitized you to the world's secret beauty. It may also inspire you to treat other people's hearts with greater care, making it more likely that you'll be able to create intelligent intimacy in the future.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♍ VIRGO

(August 23-September 22)
French novelist Gustave Flaubert (1821-1880) is generally regarded as one of the greats. His book Madame Bovary appears on many lists of the greatest novels of all time. And yet writing didn't come especially easy for him. He worked as hard as a ditch-digger. It wasn't uncommon for him to spend several agonizing days in squeezing out a single page. On some occasions he literally beat his head against a wall, as if trying to dislodge the right words from their hiding place in his brain. He's your role model in the coming week, Virgo. You can create something of value, although it may require hard labor.


You can still listen to my long-range, in-depth explorations of your destiny in 2010. Each report in the three-part series of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES is about 6-9 minutes long. A new short-term forecast for this week is also available. Sign in to access the 'scopes here.

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Compose and cast a love spell on yourself. There's no need to consult pagan books about how to proceed. It may even be better if you improvise homemade conjurations and incantations.

Be sure to formulate a clear intention of what you want to accomplish with your mojo. Example: "I want to make myself irresistibly lovable." For best results, stand naked in front of an altar crammed with magical objects that symbolize both lust and compassion.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♎ LIBRA

(September 23-October 22)
My theory is that right now the whole world is in love with you. In some places, this simmering adoration is bordering on infatuation. Creatures great and small are more apt than usual to recognize what's beautiful and original about you. As a result, wonders and marvels are likely to coalesce in your vicinity. Is there anything you can do to ensure that events unfold in ways that will yield maximum benefits for everyone concerned? Yes: Be yourself with as much tender intensity as you can muster.


You can still listen to my long-range, in-depth explorations of your destiny in 2010. Each report in the three-part series of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES is about 6-9 minutes long. A new short-term forecast for this week is also available. Sign in to access the 'scopes here.

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Bring the spirits of sampling and the mash-up into your relationship life. Sampling is what happens when a musician openly lifts a riff out of an existing song and inserts it into his or her own composition. In a mash-up, a producer takes parts from two different songs to assemble a new song that has elements of both originals but is an entirely new creation.

How might you apply these approaches to your collaborations with intimate allies? For example, you could "sample" a close friend's favorite catchphrases or clothes, and use them as your own. Or tell that person a story from his or her own past, but recount it as if it happened to you. The two of you could write a journal entry together, taking turns spinning out each new line. You might even switch roles for a day, trying out what it actually feels like to be the other person.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♏ SCORPIO

(October 23-November 21)
I hope that you saw the horoscope I wrote for you last week. And I hope that you acted on my advice and refrained from all sweating and striving and struggling. These past seven days were designed by the universe to be a time for you to recharge your psychic battery. Assuming that you took advantage of the opportunity, you should now be ready to shift gears. In this new phase, your assignment is to work extra hard and extra sweet on yourself. By that I mean you should make your way down into your depths and change around everything that isn't functioning with grace and power. Tweak your attitudes. Rearrange your emotional flow. Be an introspective master of self-refinement.


You can still listen to my long-range, in-depth explorations of your destiny in 2010. Each report in the three-part series of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES is about 6-9 minutes long. A new short-term forecast for this week is also available. Sign in to access the 'scopes here.

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Play the game called "Tell me the story of your scars." It's best to do it with a skilled empath who is curious about your fate's riddles and skilled at helping you find redemption in your wounds.

"How did you get that blotch on your knee?" he or she might begin, and you describe the time in childhood when you fell on the sidewalk. Then maybe he or she would say, "Why do you always look so sad when you hear that song?" And you'd narrate the tale of how it was playing when an old lover broke your heart. The questions and answers continue until you unveil the history of your hurts, both physical and psychic. Treat yourself to this game soon.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♐ SAGITTARIUS

(November 22-December 21)
This horoscope borrows from one of my favorite Sagittarian visionaries, Jonathan Zap. The advice he gives below, which is in accordance with your astrological omens, is designed to help you avoid the fate he warns against. Here it is: "Many of the significant problems in our lives are more about recognizing the obvious rather than discovering the mysterious or hidden. One of the classic ways we deceive and hide from ourselves is by refusing to recognize the obvious, and shrouding what is right before us in rationalization and false complexity. We often delay and deny necessary transformation by claiming that there is a mysterious answer hidden from us, when actually we know the answers but pretend that we don't." (More here and here.


You can still listen to my long-range, in-depth explorations of your destiny in 2010. Each report in the three-part series of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES is about 6-9 minutes long. A new short-term forecast for this week is also available. Sign in to access the 'scopes here.

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You understand that you can never own love, right? No matter how much someone adores you today, no matter how much you adore someone, you can't force that unique state of grace to keep its shape forever. It will inevitably evolve or mutate, perhaps into a different version of tender caring, but maybe not. From there it will continue to change, into either yet another version of interesting affection, or who knows what else?

Describe how you could get the hang of putting this tricky wisdom into practice.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♑ CAPRICORN

(December 22-January 19)
It's a good time to take inventory of all the stories you allow to pour into your beautiful head. Do you absorb a relentless stream of fear-inducing news reports and violent movies and gossipy tales of decline and degeneration? Well, then, guess what: It's the equivalent, for your psyche, of eating rotting bear intestines and crud scraped off a dumpster wall and pitchers full of trans fats from partially hydrogenated oil. But maybe, on the other hand, you tend to expose yourself to comedies that loosen your fixations and poems that stretch your understanding of the human condition and conversations about all the things that are working pretty well. If so, you're taking good care of your precious insides; you're fostering your mental health. Now please drink in this fresh truth from Nigerian writer Ben Okri: "Beware of the stories you read or tell; subtly, at night, beneath the waters of consciousness, they are altering your world."


You can still listen to my long-range, in-depth explorations of your destiny in 2010. Each report in the three-part series of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES is about 6-9 minutes long. A new short-term forecast for this week is also available. Sign in to access the 'scopes here.

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"Love is being stupid together," said French poet Paul Valery. While there's a grain of truth to that, it's too corny and decadent for my tastes. I prefer to focus on a more interesting truth, which is this: Real love is being smart together. If you weave your destiny together with another's, he or she should catalyze your sleeping potentials, sharpen your perceptions, and boost both your emotional and analytical intelligence. Your relationship becomes a crucible in which you deepen your understanding of the way the world works.

Give an example of your closest approach to this model in your own life. Then formulate a vow in which you promise you'll do what's necessary to more fully embody the principle "Love is being smart together."
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♒ AQUARIUS

(January 20- February 18)
In the coming week, I predict that you will NOT experience disgusting fascinations, smiling-faced failures, sensationalized accounts of useless developments, or bizarre fantasies in the middle of the night. You may, on the other hand, have encounters with uplifting disappointments, incendiary offers of assistance, mysterious declarations of interdependence, and uproars that provoke your awe and humility in healing ways. In other words, Aquarius, it'll be an uncanny, perhaps controversial time for you -- but always leading in the direction of greater freedom.


You can still listen to my long-range, in-depth explorations of your destiny in 2010. Each report in the three-part series of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES is about 6-9 minutes long. A new short-term forecast for this week is also available. Sign in to access the 'scopes here.

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"For a relationship to stay alive," writes James Hillman, "love alone is not enough. Without imagination, love stales into sentiment, duty, boredom. Relationships fail not because we have stopped loving but because we first stopped imagining."

Make this your hypothesis. The next time you sense that you're about to say the same old thing to your closest ally, interrupt yourself and head off in the direction of storyland.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♓ PISCES

(February 19-March 20)
Congrats on your growing ability to do more floating and less thrashing as you cascade down the stream of consciousness. I think you're finally understanding that a little bit of chaos isn't a sign that everything's falling apart forever omigod the entire planet's crashing and evil is in ascension . . . but rather that a healthy amount of bewildering unpredictability keeps things fresh and clean. My advice is to learn to relax even more as you glide with serene amusement through the bubbling and churning waters of life.


You can still listen to my long-range, in-depth explorations of your destiny in 2010. Each report in the three-part series of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES is about 6-9 minutes long. A new short-term forecast for this week is also available. Sign in to access the 'scopes here.

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Would you like to make yourself more magnetic to blessings? You could experiment with good luck charms or magic amulets -- objects that you imagine might attract benevolence into your life. How about a replica of Brísingamen, the magical necklace of the Norse goddess Freya? When she wore it, neither man nor god could resist her allure. Or maybe a copy of the thyrsus, a wand wielded by Dionysus, the god of ecstasy? Or the bracelet of meteorite chunks I saw advertised as a luck-bringer in the back of a tabloid?

As fun as things like these might be, I believe there's a superior approach to the art of charging up your mojo. It's embodied by the metaphorical talisman that Tom Waits recommends in his song "Get Behind the Mule": Always keep a diamond in your mind.

Go get one of those diamonds.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.


Listen to Rob's Expanded Audio Horoscopes, updated weekly.



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