Ideally, you wouldn't even be reading this. You'd be white-water rafting along the Franklin River in Tasmania, or riding on "the train at the end of the world" in Tierra del Fuego, or observing Golden Bamboo lemurs in the rainforest of southeastern Madagascar. Ideally, Sagittarius, you'd be far away from any newspaper that carries my column. You'd be taking a vacation from the Internet and unable to access my horoscopes there. In fact, you'd be out of touch with all media, period. But since you are reading this, you must not be doing the ideal thing. So please do the next best thing: Flee as far as possible from your usual haunts, your habitual influences, and your customary comforts.

No one knows you better than you do. But maybe you'll be inspired to dig up even more self-knowledge if you tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE for the week ahead.