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Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny


Week of March 26th, 2009

♍ VIRGO

(August 23-September 22)
This is an ideal time to have sessions with a sex therapist so as to get to the root of any inhibitions that might be preventing you from claiming your full measure of orgasmic enlightenment. APRIL FOOL! While this is a fantastic time to deepen your access to the spiritual gifts of erotic bliss, you won't need a therapist to accomplish it. Here's all you really require: 1. a fantasy of making love with an inscrutable deity who has four arms, the better to hug you with; 2. a pretend aphrodisiac made from the peaches of immortality that you'll steal from the tree of life in your dream tonight; 3. an invisible sex toy that you create in your mind's eye while you're meditating about the most sublime situation you've ever been in.


No one knows you better than you do. But maybe you'll be inspired to dig up even more self-knowledge if you tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE for the week ahead.

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Listen to and download my band's song Apathy and Ignorance. It's from the CD Give Too Much.