Sometime in the next week, the spirits of Nostradamus, Edgar Cayce, John the Baptist, and Jean-Paul Sartre will come to you in a vision to tell you how to prosper during the coming Great Depression. With their expert tips you will spend the years 2010-2013 safe and sound and well-fed in a gated community while millions of your fellow humans are rioting in the streets over scraps of food. APRIL FOOL! Everything I just said is a lie. The more modest truth is that you now have access to great insight about how to increase your long-term stability and security. Take advantage!

Got enough clues to chew on for a while? If you need more, give yourself the luxury of your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE for the week ahead.

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Listen to and download my band's song Apathy and Ignorance. It's from the CD Give Too Much.