So many miraculous images of Jesus have been appearing in Cheetos corn chips lately that a new cult of "Cheesus" worshipers has sprung up. I suggest you consider the possibility of joining them. This is a favorable time to switch your religious affiliation to a faith that puts great stock in goofy miracles. ARPIL FOOL! I lied, sort of. There's really no mandate for you to become a Cheesus Freak. But it is a fine time to add tender irreverence and fun-loving funkiness to your spiritual aspirations.

Do you want further explorations of the intriguing twists and turns of your personal evolution? Check out your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE for the week ahead.

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Listen to and download my band's song Apathy and Ignorance. It's from the CD Give Too Much.