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Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny

Week of October 9th, 2008


(July 23-August 22)
Popular conceptions of Jesus depict him as bearded and long-haired. Not so, declares fundamentalist Pastor Jack Hyles on his website. He says Christ was clean-shaven and had a pixie-cut hairstyle parted in the middle and curled up at the ends. After studying Hyles' arguments, however, I believe his evidence is flimsy -- just as I find no merit in his implication that Jesus was a stuffy, prudish right-winger who loved rich white men best and taught that we should eliminate people we disagree with. So I'm sticking with my image of Jesus as a peaceful yet rebellious hippie who didn't own property, hung out with social outcasts, was strongly anti-authoritarian, and loved everyone, even his enemies. I bring this to your attention, Leo, in the hope that you'll be inspired by my example. It's time to revisit one of your best teacher's essential messages, and rededicate yourself to those beautiful truths.

Want to hear more about the hidden factors influencing your life? Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE for the week ahead.


Where exactly does happiness come from? That's the riddle posed by David Meyers and Ed Diener in their article, "The Science of Happiness," published in The Futurist magazine. I invite you to write your own answers to their question. Map out the foundations of your own science of happiness. Get serious about defining what makes you feel good. What specific experiences arouse your deepest gratification? Physical pleasure? Seeking the truth? Being a good person? Contemplating the meaning of life? Enjoying the fruits of your accomplishments? Purging pent-up emotion?
The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. It's available at Amazon or Powells. Go here to listen to "You Are a Gorgeous Genius," a new podcast of me delivering an excerpt from my book. You can also listen to other podcasts here and here and here and here.