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Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny


Week of August 14th, 2008

♋ CANCERIAN

(June 21-July 22)
A teacher at an all-girl Japanese elementary school decided her class would put on a performance of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. But when she selected a certain student to play Snow White, the parents of the other 24 kids went ballistic. Through a campaign of harassment, they bullied the teacher into changing the script so that there would be 25 Snow Whites, no dwarfs, and no wicked witch. In my opinion, that's the wrong way to apply democratic principles. I'm more anti-hierarchical than anyone I know, and yet even I would draw the line at, say, no more than five Snow Whites. Please be vigilant for the possibility that a similar misapplication of egalitarianism will take place in your personal sphere. Make sure there's at least one dwarf.


Where do you want to go? Who do you want to be? For more clues, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE for the week ahead.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
Scientists have confirmed what we all knew: You do indeed have a little voice in your head that warns you when you're about to do something dumb. It's called the anterior cingulate cortex, according to white-coated authorities at Carnegie-Mellon University. If you're receptive to it, it's as good as having a guardian angel.

"Don't do it," the voice whispers when you're on the verge of locking your keys in your car or leaving the bar with the cute drunk you just met. "Go back," it murmurs as you start to walk away from a huge, though initially inconvenient, opportunity.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. It's available at Amazon or Powells.