"Dear Dr. Brezsny: I love my weekly dose of astrological wit, but I've got to say that if I had all the fun and revelry you predict, I wouldn't be a morose meandering malcontent, as I am now. And if I had even half of the flirting and romance that your prophecies promise, I certainly wouldn't be home on Saturday nights playing World of Warcraft. I must conclude that you're living in a different dimension than I am. So how do I get over there to where you are? - Up-in-the-Air Libra." Dear Up-in-the-Air: Funny you should mention this. Due to a rare crack in the space-time continuum, there's currently a wormhole between my dimension and the dimension where up-in-the-air Libras live. Come on over! You'll know you're near the portal when you feel an urge to exuberantly leap up off your feet for no reason.

What blessings will life bring you? What challenges will you be invited to dive into? To explore the ripening trends further, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE for the week ahead.

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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. It's available at Amazon or Powells.