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Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny


Week of April 5th, 2007

♒ AQUARIUS

(January 20- February 18)
Saturn and Neptune have been in opposition since August, and will continue to be until late June. This omen tells us that it's prime time to dissolve rigid, outworn structures in both our personal lives and in society. Meanwhile, a grand trine in the fire signs is now upon us, featuring Jupiter, Saturn, and the sun. To celebrate this auspicious portent, you should think hard about how you can communicate better. Make new connections and alliances that will serve your long-term happiness. Scheme about how to get your good ideas heard by people who can help you manifest them. And for extra credit, Aquarius, meditate on how to coordinate the opportunities afforded you by the fire trine with the creatively destructive possibilities offered by the Saturn-Neptune dance.


Do you want further explorations of the intriguing twists and turns of your personal evolution? Check out your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE for the week ahead.

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Review in painstaking detail the history of your life, honoring every moment as if you were conducting a benevolent Judgment Day.

Forgive yourself of every mistake except one.

Create a royal crown for yourself out of a shower cap, rubber bands, and light bulbs.

Think of the last place on earth you'd ever want to visit, and visualize yourself having fun there.

Test to see if people are really listening to you by asserting that Karl Marx was one of the Marx Brothers.

Steal lint from dryers in laundromats and use it to make animal sculptures for someone you admire.

Fantasize you're the child of divine parents who abandoned you when you were two days old, but who will soon be coming back to reunite with you.

Meditate on how one of the symbols of plenitude in Nepal is a mongoose vomiting jewels.

Once a year on the day before your birthday, say these words into a mirror: "It's bad luck to be superstitious."

Start a club whose purpose is to produce an archive of controversial jokes and obscene limericks about beauty, truth, and love.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. It's available at Amazon or Barnes & Noble.