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Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny


Week of February 15th, 2007

♊ GEMINI

(May 21-June 20)
You seem to be suffering, although in an interesting way, from a metaphysical version of jet lag. Maybe it's because you've been stretching your boundaries with such experimental vigor. Or maybe it's because you've been engaging in a form of time-travel, exploring the past and future in your dreams and fantasies. In any case, you can take comfort in the knowledge that the warps and tweaks you're dealing with are the results of your brave choices. Congratulations as well for having churned up the most useful riddles you've had to ponder since you jumped out of your skin last year.


You can still listen to my long-range, in-depth explorations of your destiny in 2007. Each report in the three-part series is about 6-8 minutes long. A new short-range forecast for this week is also available.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
Discordianism is one of the rare religions that takes account of Ralph Abraham’s assertion that heart physiologists find more chaos in the healthy heart than in the sick heart. Here’s a sampling of Discordian tenets. 1. Everyone is a saint, especially you. 2. Meditation consists primarily of cruising around looking for good luck. 3. Eating hot dog buns is prohibited, except on Friday, when it’s compulsory. 4. When you’re stuck in a rut, you must speak in tongues, handle snakes, and experience phantasmagoria. 5. Your guardian angel loves you better when your room is a mess. 6. Bowling alleys are sacred; you must protect them from desecration. 7. The Goddess will solve all your problems if you solve all hers.

The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. It's available at Amazon or Barnes & Noble.