Free Will Astrology


Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny


Week of October 13th, 2016

♈ ARIES

(March 21-April 19)
A study published in the peer-reviewed Communications Research suggests that only 28 percent of us realize when someone is flirting with us. I hope that figure won’t apply to you Aries in the coming weeks. According to my analysis of the astrological situation, you will be on the receiving end of more invitations, inquiries, and allurements than usual. The percentage of these that might be worth responding to will also be higher than normal. Not all of them will be obvious, however. So be extra vigilant.

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Would you like to hear more about the hidden factors influencing your life? Do you want to uncover the secrets you've been hiding even from yourself? Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Notice how you feel as you speak the following: "The strong, independent part of me resisted the embarrassing truth for a long time, but I finally came to accept that I'm someone who craves vast amounts of love. Ever since I surrendered to this need, it doesn't nag me all the time, as it used to. In fact, it feels comforting, like a source of sweetness that doesn't go away. I never thought I'd say this, but I've come to treasure the feeling of having a voracious yearning to be loved."

♉ TAURUS

(April 20-May 20)
The ancient Greek sage Socrates was a founder of Western philosophy and a seminal champion of critical thinking. And yet he relied on his dreams for crucial information. He was initiated into the esoteric mysteries of love by the prophetess Diotima, and had an intimate relationship with a daimonion, a divine spirit. I propose that we make Socrates your patron saint for the next three weeks. Without abandoning your reliance on logic, make a playful effort to draw helpful clues from non-rational sources, too. (P.S.: Socrates drew oracular revelations from sneezes. Please consider that outlandish possibility yourself. Be alert, too, for the secret meanings of coughs, burps, grunts, mumbles, and yawns.)

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Do you wish you could get more clarity about the foggy, ambiguous situations you're dealing with? Want more help in exploring the Great Mystery that is your life? I discuss your coming week in greater depth in your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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To be the best pronoiac explorer you can be, I suggest you adopt an outlook that combines the objectivity of a scientist, the "beginner's mind" of Zen Buddhism, and the compassionate friendliness of the Dalai Lama.

To pull this off, you'll have to be willing to suspend your brilliant theories about the way the world works. Accept with good humor the possibility that what you've learned in the past may not be a reliable guide to understanding the fresh phenomenon that's right in front of you. Be suspicious of your biases, even the rational and benevolent ones. Open your heart as you strip away the interpretations that your emotions might be inclined to impose.

"Before we can receive the unbiased truth about anything," wrote my teacher Ann Davies, "we have to be ready to ignore what we would like to be true."

At the same time, don't turn into a hard-ass, poker-faced robot. Keep your feelings moist and receptive. Remember your natural affection for all of creation. Enjoy the power of tender sympathy as it drives you to probe for the unimaginable revelations of every new moment. "Before we can receive the entire truth about anything," said Ann Davies, "we have to love it."

♊ GEMINI

(May 21-June 20)
The Helper Experiment, Part One: Close your eyes and imagine that you are in the company of a kind, attentive helper -- a person, animal, ancestral spirit, or angel that you either know well or haven't met yet. Spend at least five minutes visualizing a scene in which this ally aids you in fulfilling a particular goal. The Helper Experiment, Part Two: Repeat this exercise every day for the next seven days. Each time, visualize your helper making your life better in some specific way. Now here's my prediction: Carrying out The Helper Experiment will attract actual support into your real life.

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Do you want further explorations of the intriguing twists and turns of your personal evolution? Would you like help in solving the riddles that confuse you? Check out your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Act as if the universe is a prodigious miracle created for your amusement and illumination. Assume that secret helpers are working behind the scenes to assist you in turning into the gorgeous masterpiece you were born to be. Retrain your senses and intellect so you're able to perceive the fact that life always gives you exactly what you need, exactly when you need it.

♋ CANCERIAN

(June 21-July 22)
New rules: 1. It's unimaginable and impossible for you to be obsessed with anything or anyone that's no good for you. 2. It's unimaginable and impossible for you to sabotage your stability by indulging in unwarranted fear. 3. It's imaginable and possible for you to remember the most crucial thing you have forgotten. 4. It's imaginable and possible for you to replace debilitating self-pity with invigorating self-love and healthy self-care. 5. It's imaginable and possible for you to discover a new mother lode of emotional strength.

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Need more help in figuring out the questions life is asking you? Crave more support in your efforts to build your courage? Check out your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Half of the art of pronoia is about being improvisationally receptive to life's elaborate scheme to shower you with blessings. The other half is about learning to be a co-conspirator who assists life in doling out blessings -- to help everyone else get exactly what they need, exactly when they need it.

Visualize yourself being able to recognize the raw truth about the people you care about, seeing how they already embody the beauty their souls' codes have promised as well as how they still fall short of embodying that beauty. Imagine yourself being able to make them feel appreciated even as you inspire them to risk changes that will activate more of their souls' codes.

♌ LEO

(July 23-August 22)
It's swing-swirl-spiral time, Leo. It's ripple-sway-flutter time and flow-gush-gyrate time and jive-jiggle-juggle time. So I trust you will not indulge in fruitless yearnings for unswerving progress and rock-solid evidence. If your path is not twisty and tricky, it's probably the wrong path. If your heart isn't teased and tickled into shedding its dependable formulas, it might be an overly hard heart. Be an improvisational curiosity-seeker. Be a principled player of unpredictable games.

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What fresh blessings will life bring you? What questions should you be asking? To explore the ripening trends further, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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"Is it bad to live without a hell?" poet Pablo Neruda asks in The Book of Questions. Let's add these queries to his: Is it dangerous to live without an enemy? Is it naive to think you can achieve great success without the driving motivation that comes from having ideas you hate? There are thousands of correct answers to these questions. What are yours?

Consider the issue from another angle. Dentists love tooth decay. Treating cavities provides them with a steady source of income. Likewise, exterminators are dependent on termites, lawyers need crimes, and priests are hungry for sinners. Lots of people have symbiotic connections with nasty stuff. In fact, isn't it true that most of us nurture our feelings for the things we love to despise and fear?

What's your favorite poison or adversary? Assume that your exposure to pronoia is changing you in ways that will require you to update your relationship with it. Speculate on how you'll go about this task.

♍ VIRGO

(August 23-September 22)
Some English-speaking astronomers use the humorous slang term "meteor-wrong." It refers to a rock that is at first thought to have fallen from the heavens as a meteorite ("meteor-right"), but that is ultimately proved to be of terrestrial origin. I suspect there may currently be the metaphorical equivalent of a meteor-wrong in your life. The source of some new arrival or fresh influence is not what it had initially seemed. But that doesn't have to be a problem. On the contrary. Once you have identified the true nature of the new arrival or fresh influence, it's likely to be useful and interesting.

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Want to explore this chapter of your life story even further? Dig deeper? Push harder? Consider tuning in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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The factor most likely to drive us to addiction or illness is a lack of intimate contact with spirit. We all need a daily dose of vastness. Paradoxically, many of us would also benefit from more microscopic vision. Because we're so deprived of divine connection, we're half-dreaming all the time; our unconscious pining for the eternal source distracts us from the vivid little glories that are splayed out around us. And so we miss the Divine Wow from both directions.

Try this: Prime your connection with spirit by focusing your attention on tones and shapes you usually miss: reflections in windows, the sky between the oak tree's branches, the shadows on the water, the two different emotions in a friend's eyes and mouth.

♎ LIBRA

(September 23-October 22)
Most of us can't tickle ourselves. Since we have conscious control of our fingers, we know we can stop any time. Without the element of uncertainty, our squirm reflex doesn't kick in. But I'm wondering if you might get a temporary exemption from this rule in the coming weeks. I say this because the astrological omens suggest you will have an extraordinary capacity to surprise yourself. Novel impulses will be rising up in you on a regular basis. Unpredictability and spontaneity will be your specialties. Have fun doing what you don't usually do!

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You're got more strength and intelligence than you realize. For help in accessing those untapped inner resources, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Have you ever had permission to indulge in a marathon of braggadocio? Have you ever gotten an invitation to bluster on endlessly about your own charms without feeling even a touch of guilt or inhibition? I hereby grant you such a license right now.

When you're ready, carry out the exercise called Brag Therapy. Grab a good listener or a recording device, and boast extravagantly about yourself for at least 20 minutes. Expound in exhaustive detail why you're so wonderful and why the world would be a better place if everyone would just act more like you.

Don't be humble or cautious. Go too far. Heap extreme glory on yourself. Brazenly proclaim the fabulous qualities about you that no one has ever fully articulated or appreciated. Don't forget to extol the prodigious flaws and vices that make you so special.

What does this have to do with pronoia? When you audaciously identify your existing gifts, you set yourself up to become a magnet for even greater abundance. In fact, we recommend that you treat yourself to a Brag Therapy session regularly.

To whet your imagination, read an excerpt from the boast of Eric Baer, a participant in a Brag Therapy session I hosted in Milwaukee. "I have opposable thumbs," Eric exulted. "I can read. I breathe all the way through the night even though I'm asleep. I have access to emporiums where I can choose from 25 different brands of toilet paper. I know how to turn food into energy. I live where knuckleheads run everything and yet nothing ever blows up."

♏ SCORPIO

(October 23-November 21)
During the final ten weeks of 2016, your physical and mental health will flourish in direct proportion to how much outworn and unnecessary stuff you flush out of your life between now and October 25. Here are some suggested tasks: 1. Perform a homemade ritual that will enable you to magically shed at least half of your guilt, remorse, and regret. 2. Put on a festive party hat, gather up all the clutter and junk from your home, and drop it off at a thrift store or the dump. 3. Take a vow that you will do everything in your power to kick your attachment to an influence that's no damn good for you. 4. Scream nonsense curses at the night sky for as long as it takes to purge your sadness and anger about pain that no longer matters.

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How are you going to change what needs to be changed and accept what needs to be accepted? To get some support from me, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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I invite you to speak the following lines out loud:
I love everything about me
I love my uncanny beauty and my bewildering pain
I love my hungry soul and my wounded longing
I love my flaws, my fears, and my scary frontiers

I will never forsake, betray, or deceive myself
I will always adore, forgive, and believe in myself
I will never refuse, abandon, or scorn myself
I will always amuse, delight, and redeem myself

♐ SAGITTARIUS

(November 22-December 21)
A Buddhist monk named Matthieu Ricard had his brain scanned while he meditated. The experiment revealed that the positive emotions whirling around in his gray matter were super-abundant. Various publications thereafter dubbed him "the happiest person in the world." Since he's neither egotistical nor fond of the media's simplistic sound bites, he's not happy about that title. I hope you won't have a similar reaction when I predict that you Sagittarians will be the happiest tribe of the zodiac during the next two weeks. For best results, I suggest you cultivate Ricard's definitions of happiness: "altruism and compassion, inner freedom (so that you are not the slave of your own thoughts), senses of serenity and fulfillment, resilience, as well as a clear and stable mind that does not distort reality too much."

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Sometimes it's a challenge to try to figure out what's important and what's not important. If you'd like more of my input, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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May you eat an unfamiliar dessert in a strange land at least once every three years.

May you wake up to salsa music one summer morning, and start dancing while you're still half-asleep.

May you spray-paint Rilke poems as graffiti on highway overpasses.

May you mix stripes with plaids, floral patterns with checks, and yellowish-green with brownish-purple.

May you learn to identify by name 20 flowers, 15 trees, 10 clouds, and one extrasolar planet.

May you put a bumper sticker on your car or bike that says, "My god can kick your god's ass!"

If you bury your face in your tear-stained pillow and beg God to please send you your soul mate, may you not slur your words in such a way that they sound like "cell mate."

May you dream of taking a trip to the moon in a gondola powered by firecrackers and wild swans.

May you actually kiss the earth now and then.

May you find many good excuses to say what physicist Niels Bohr once did: "Your theory is crazy, but it's not crazy enough to be true."

♑ CAPRICORN

(December 22-January 19)
Now is a perfect moment to launch or refine a project that will generate truth, beauty, and justice. Amazingly enough, now is also an excellent time to launch or refine a long-term master plan that will make you healthy, wealthy, and wise. Is this a coincidence? Not at all. The astrological omens suggest that your drive to be of noble service dovetails well with your drive for personal success. For the foreseeable future, unselfish goals are well-aligned with selfish goals.

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How well is your imagination working these days? Could it use a boost? A prod? A jolt of inspiration? Try tuning in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Say this: "Novel intuitions are now erupting from my smart heart, awakening me from any trance I've been ensnared in. I am hereby breaking and escaping obstructions that have hindered my ability to express my soul's code. All of my unique capacities are being unleashed, all of my potentials activated. I recognize that I'm a miraculous work of art, a masterpiece unlike any other ever created in the history of the world."

Say this: "I am a genius. I am a lucky, plucky, good-sucking genius."

♒ AQUARIUS

(January 20- February 18)
Has your world become at least 20 percent larger since September 1? Has your generosity grown to near-heroic proportions? Have your eyes beheld healing sights that were previously invisible to you? Have you lost at least two of your excuses for tolerating scrawny expectations? Are you awash in the desire to grant forgiveness and amnesty? If you can't answer yes to at least two of those questions, Aquarius, it means you're not fully in harmony with your best possible destiny. So get to work! Attune yourself to the cosmic tendencies! And if you are indeed reaping the benefits I mentioned, congratulations -- and prepare for even further expansions and liberations.

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Want more clues? Need further insight? For more evocative questions and pithy suggestions about your unfolding destiny, check out your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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"Nothing's going right in my life. I feel anxious and paranoid all the time. My relationships are a mess." In my line of work, people make confessions like that to me. My first response is usually something like this: "Do you habitually gobble junk food near bedtime, steal a paltry five hours of sleep per night, gulp two cups of coffee and no breakfast in the morning, then bolt to a workplace where you get no sunlight or exercise and sit in an uncomfortable chair?" They often reply, "You must be psychic! How did you know?!" My point is that many psychological troubles stem from our chronic failure to take good care of our physical needs.

Name three things you can do to promote pronoia in yourself by taking better care of your body.

♓ PISCES

(February 19-March 20)
Some astrologers dwell on your tribe's phobias. They assume that you Pisceans are perversely drawn to fear; that you are addicted to the strong feelings it generates. In an effort to correct this distorted view, and in accordance with current astrological omens, I hereby declare the coming weeks to be a Golden Age for Your Trust in Life. It will be prime time to exult in everything that evokes your joy and excitement. I suggest you make a list of these glories, and keep adding new items to the list every day. Here's another way to celebrate the Golden Age: Discover and explore previously unknown sources of joy and excitement.

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How much do you want to know about your life? How far do you dare to go in your quest for self-mastery? For more insight into your intriguing fate, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Where exactly does happiness come from? That's the riddle posed by David Meyers and Ed Diener in their article, "The Science of Happiness," published in The Futurist magazine. I invite you to write your own answers to their question. Map out the foundations of your own science of happiness. Get serious about defining what makes you feel good. What specific experiences arouse your deepest gratification? Physical pleasure? Seeking the truth? Being a good person? Contemplating the meaning of life? Enjoying the fruits of your accomplishments? Purging pent-up emotion?

© Rob Brezsny 1995-2019