Members of the Nevada Republican Party have concocted a bizarre version of family values. A large majority of them are opposed to gay marriage and yet are all in favor of legal brothels. Their wacky approach to morality is as weird as that of the family values crowd in Texas, which thinks it's wrong to teach adolescents about birth control even though this has led to a high rate of teen pregnancies. My question is, why do we let people with screwed-up priorities claim to be the prime caretakers of "family values"? In accordance with the astrological omens, I urge you to reject the conventional wisdom as you clarify what that term means to you. It's an excellent time to deepen and strengthen your moral foundation.

Want to go further in exploring the Great Mystery that is your life? I discuss the possibilities for the week ahead in your Expanded Audio Horoscope.

I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR PREVIEW -- an audio report on YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY from now through JANUARY 2013 and beyond. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2012." The cost is $6.

What are your plans for the rest of the year? Could you use some more help in mapping out your dreams and schemes? Maybe you can accomplish more than you think in the next nine months. Tune in.

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"The people of future generations will win many a liberty of which we do not yet even feel the want," said German philosopher Max Stirner. See if you can become aware of an interesting freedom that has not previously been on your radar screen.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

There's a term for people who have the ardor of a nymphomaniac in their efforts to gather useful information: infomaniac. That's exactly what I think you should be in the coming week. You need data and evidence, and you need them in abundance. What you don't know would definitely hurt you, so make sure you find out everything you need to know. Be as thorough as a spy, as relentless as a muckraking journalist, and as curious as a child. P.S. See if you can set aside as many of your strong opinions and emotional biases as possible. Otherwise they might distort your quest for the raw truth. Your word of power is empirical.

Want to go further in exploring the Great Mystery that is your life? I discuss the possibilities for the week ahead in your Expanded Audio Horoscope.

I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR PREVIEW -- an audio report on YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY from now through JANUARY 2013 and beyond. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2012." The cost is $6.

What are your plans for the rest of the year? Could you use some more help in mapping out your dreams and schemes? Maybe you can accomplish more than you think in the next nine months. Tune in.

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Meditate on the following rant, which Beauty and Truth Lab operatives put on flyers and tacked up on laundromat bulletin boards all over San Francisco:

"The Doctrine of Original Sin? We spit on it. We reject it. We renounce it and forget it and annihilate it from reality. In its place we embrace the Doctrine of Original Fun. This reformulation asserts that it is our birthright to commune with regular doses of curious beauty and tricky truth and insurrectionary love. A robust, heroic joy is even now roaring through us, bringing us good ideas about how to apply the metaphor of ingenious foreplay to everything we do. We will not waste this euphoric deluge on any of the million and one numbing little diversions that pass for pleasure among the ecstasy-starved pursuers of mediocre joy. Rather, we will remain ever alert for the call of primordial delight."
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

Of all the signs of the zodiac, you're the best at discovering short cuts. No one is more talented than you at the art of avoiding boredom. And you could teach a master course in how to weasel out of strenuous work without looking like a weasel. None of those virtues will come in handy during the coming week, however. The way I see it, you should concentrate very hard on not skipping any steps. You should follow the rules, stick to the plan, and dedicate yourself to the basics. Finish what you start, please! (Sorry about this grind-it-out advice. I'm just reporting what the planetary omens are telling me.)

Want to go further in exploring the Great Mystery that is your life? I discuss the possibilities for the week ahead in your Expanded Audio Horoscope.

I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR PREVIEW -- an audio report on YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY from now through JANUARY 2013 and beyond. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2012." The cost is $6.

What are your plans for the rest of the year? Could you use some more help in mapping out your dreams and schemes? Maybe you can accomplish more than you think in the next nine months. Tune in.

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"The really important kind of freedom," said David Foster Wallace, "involves attention and awareness and discipline, and being able truly to care about other people and to sacrifice for them over and over in myriad petty, unsexy ways every day."

Is that an interesting kind of freedom to you? Can you imagine any scenario in which practicing it would crack you open and pour you into an ecstatic state?
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

The epic breadth of your imagination is legendary. Is there anyone else who can wander around the world without ever once leaving your home? Is there anyone else who can reincarnate twice in the span of few weeks without having to go through the hassle of actually dying? And yet now and then there do come times when your fantasies should be set aside so that you may soak up the teachings that flow your way when you physically venture outside of your comfort zone. Now is such a moment, my fellow Cancerian. Please don't take a merely virtual break in the action. Get yourself away from it all, even if it's only to the marvelous diversion or magic sanctuary on the other side of town.

Want to go further in exploring the Great Mystery that is your life? I discuss the possibilities for the week ahead in your Expanded Audio Horoscope.

I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR PREVIEW -- an audio report on YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY from now through JANUARY 2013 and beyond. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2012." The cost is $6.

What are your plans for the rest of the year? Could you use some more help in mapping out your dreams and schemes? Maybe you can accomplish more than you think in the next nine months. Tune in.

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Poet Kay Ryan told the Christian Science Monitor how she cultivates the inspiration to write. She rouses the sense of a "self-imposed emergency," thereby calling forth psychic resources that usually materialize only in response to a crisis.

Please note that she doesn't provoke an actual emergency: She doesn't arrange to have a loved one get pinned beneath the wheels of a car. She doesn't climb out onto the window ledge on the 22nd story of a high-rise. Instead, she visualizes hypothetical situations that galvanize her to shift into a dramatically heightened state of awareness.

What imagined emergencies could you invoke to inspire your deep self to rise up and make its mark?
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

In Norse mythology, Fenrir was a big bad wolf that the gods were eager to keep tied up. In the beginning they tried to do it with metal chains, but the beast broke free. Then they commissioned the dwarves to weave a shackle out of six impossible things: a bear's sinews, a bird's spit, a fish's breath, a mountain's root, a woman's beard, and the sound a cat's paws made as it walked. This magic fetter was no thicker than a silk ribbon, but it worked very well. Fenrir couldn't escape from it. I invite you to take inspiration from this story, Leo. As you deal with your current dilemma, don't try to fight strength with strength. Instead, use art, craft, subtlety, and even trickery. I doubt you'll need to gather as many as six impossible things. Three will probably be enough. Two might even work fine.

Want to go further in exploring the Great Mystery that is your life? I discuss the possibilities for the week ahead in your Expanded Audio Horoscope.

I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR PREVIEW -- an audio report on YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY from now through JANUARY 2013 and beyond. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2012." The cost is $6.

What are your plans for the rest of the year? Could you use some more help in mapping out your dreams and schemes? Maybe you can accomplish more than you think in the next nine months. Tune in.

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I love this excerpt from "The Seeker," a poem by Rilke in his Book of Hours (translated by Robert Bly): "I am circling around God, around the ancient tower, / and I have been circling for a thousand years, / and I still don't know if I am a falcon, or a storm, / or a great song." Here's my own permutation: "I am circling around love, around the throbbing hum, and I have been circling for thousands of days, and I still don't know if I am a wounded saint, or a rainy dawn, or a creation story."

Compose your own version.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

This is a time when your personal actions will have more power than usual to affect the world around you. The ripples you set in motion could ultimately touch people you don't even know and transform situations you're not part of. That's a lot of responsibility! I suggest, therefore, that you be on your best behavior. Not necessarily your mildest, most polite behavior, mind you. Rather, be brave, impeccable, full of integrity, and a little wild.

Want to go further in exploring the Great Mystery that is your life? I discuss the possibilities for the week ahead in your Expanded Audio Horoscope.

I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR PREVIEW -- an audio report on YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY from now through JANUARY 2013 and beyond. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2012." The cost is $6.

What are your plans for the rest of the year? Could you use some more help in mapping out your dreams and schemes? Maybe you can accomplish more than you think in the next nine months. Tune in.

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In the Western Hermetic version of the Qabala, every Hebrew letter is paired with a number, and so every word is also a number derived from the addition of its letters. Gematria is the practice of finding hidden resonance between words that have similar numerical values. Of the many poetic truths revealed through this art, one of my favorites is this: The Hebrew words for both "serpent" and "messiah" add up to 358.

Let's suppose this can be interpreted to mean that the snaky potency of your reproductive drive is potentially the source of your salvation. What implications might that have for how you cultivate the art of ecstasy?
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

Goldfish that are confined in small aquariums stay small. Those that spend their lives in ponds get much bigger. What can we conclude from these facts? The size and growth rate of goldfish are directly related to their environment. I'd like to suggest that a similar principle will apply to you Librans in the next ten months. If you want to take maximum advantage of your potential, you will be wise to put yourself in spacious situations that encourage you to expand. For an extra boost, surround yourself with broad-minded, uninhibited people who have worked hard to heal their wounds.

Want to go further in exploring the Great Mystery that is your life? I discuss the possibilities for the week ahead in your Expanded Audio Horoscope.

I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR PREVIEW -- an audio report on YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY from now through JANUARY 2013 and beyond. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2012." The cost is $6.

What are your plans for the rest of the year? Could you use some more help in mapping out your dreams and schemes? Maybe you can accomplish more than you think in the next nine months. Tune in.

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Elijah, the beer truck driver who lives in the trailer with old tires, rusty tools, and the husk of a 1975 Chevy El Camino littering the driveway, tells me that everything he knows about God can be summed up in the bumper sticker on the back of the El Camino, which reads "Theresa and Johnny's Comfort Food -- Live Free or Die."

Mythologist Joseph Campbell, on the other hand, suggested we should imagine a deity to be like a floating ball of fire that would immediately kill anyone it touched.

Then there's the poet Rumi. He envisioned God as your tender Best Friend and Unpredictable Ally who's always as close as your own breath.

Which version do you prefer?
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

Over the years, you've explored some pretty exotic, even strange ideas about what characterizes a good time. In the coming days, I'm guessing you will add to your colorful tradition with some rather unprecedented variations on the definition of "pleasure" and "happiness." I don't mean to imply that this is a problem. Not at all. To paraphrase the Wiccan credo, as long as it harms no one (including yourself), anything goes.

Want to go further in exploring the Great Mystery that is your life? I discuss the possibilities for the week ahead in your Expanded Audio Horoscope.

I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR PREVIEW -- an audio report on YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY from now through JANUARY 2013 and beyond. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2012." The cost is $6.

What are your plans for the rest of the year? Could you use some more help in mapping out your dreams and schemes? Maybe you can accomplish more than you think in the next nine months. Tune in.

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"Take time to stop and smell the flowers," says an old homily. Albert Hoffman, the Swiss scientist who discovered LSD and lived to age 102, had a different approach. "Take the time to stop and be the flowers," he said.

That's my advice to you. Don't just set aside a few stolen moments to sniff the snapdragons, taste the rain, chase the wind, watch the hummingbirds, and listen to a friend. Use your imagination to actually be the snapdragons and rain and wind and hummingbirds and friend. Don't just behold the Other; become the Other.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

There come times in your life when you have a sacred duty to be open to interesting tangents and creative diversions; times when it makes sense to wander around aimlessly with wonder in your eyes and be alert for unexpected clues that grab your attention. But this is not one of those times, in my opinion. Rather, you really do need to stay focused on what you promised yourself you would concentrate on. The temptation may be high to send out sprays of arrows at several different targets. But I hope that instead you stick to one target and take careful aim with your best shots.

Want to go further in exploring the Great Mystery that is your life? I discuss the possibilities for the week ahead in your Expanded Audio Horoscope.

I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR PREVIEW -- an audio report on YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY from now through JANUARY 2013 and beyond. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2012." The cost is $6.

What are your plans for the rest of the year? Could you use some more help in mapping out your dreams and schemes? Maybe you can accomplish more than you think in the next nine months. Tune in.

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Beauty and Truth Lab researcher Rebecca Rusche coined the word "careenstable." Here's her explanation of how it originated: "In high school, my mom used to let me use her VW Beetle to go to basketball practice. One night after practice, a friend and I were chatting and drinking Coke when we decided to see how fast we could get the Beetle going down a nearby dirt road. Soon we were careening at 65 mph, shouting 'careen!' every time we hit a bump and flew into the air.

"When we arrived back at the gym and got out of the car half an hour later, we saw my Coke can sitting on the front bumper next to the license plate. I nudged it softly to see if it was lodged in there, but it fell right off -- wasn't stuck at all. I thought, 'There must be a word for this magic,' and thus 'careenstable' was born. It came to mean anything that maintains its poise in the midst of wild, fast movement."

Give an example of how you could experiment with making careenstable work in your own life.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

I've been meditating on a certain need that you have been neglecting, Capricorn -- a need that has been chronically underestimated, belittled, or ignored, by both you and others. I am hoping that this achy longing will soon be receiving some of your smart attention and tender care. One good way to get the process started is simply to acknowledge its validity and importance. Doing so will reveal a secret that will help you attend to your special need with just the right touch.

Want to go further in exploring the Great Mystery that is your life? I discuss the possibilities for the week ahead in your Expanded Audio Horoscope.

I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR PREVIEW -- an audio report on YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY from now through JANUARY 2013 and beyond. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2012." The cost is $6.

What are your plans for the rest of the year? Could you use some more help in mapping out your dreams and schemes? Maybe you can accomplish more than you think in the next nine months. Tune in.

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Sacred is trendy! Among the many recent books that invoke the concept are Sacred Flowers, The Sacred Art of Hunting, Sacred Hoops (about basketball), Sacred Monsters, Sacred Hunger, The Sacred Landscape, and Sacred Sexuality. It's fine with me, really. I'd like to sacralize the whole damn world.

There was one case, however, that tested even my capacity to find holy meaning everywhere: a class offered at the New Age Expo called "The Sacred Art of Publicity." When I saw that, I nearly spit out the gulp of goji berry and spirulina smoothie that I had just sipped. "What's next?" I thought. "Sacred shopping for automatic weapons? Sacred gambling at an Indian casino?" But in the next moment I had to admit that even those might be possible.

What's the most outlandish sacred act you can think of pulling off? Do it.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

Due to the pressure-packed influences currently coming to bear on your destiny, you have Official Cosmic Permission to fling three dishes against the wall. (But no more than three.) If you so choose, you also have clearance to hurl rocks in the direction of heaven, throw darts at photos of your nemeses, and cram a coconut cream pie into your own face. Please understand, however, that taking actions like these should be just the initial phase of your master plan for the week. In the next phase, you should capitalize on all the energy you've made available for yourself through purgative acts like the ones I mentioned. Capitalize how? For starters, you could dream and scheme about how you will liberate yourself from things that make you angry and frustrated.

Want to go further in exploring the Great Mystery that is your life? I discuss the possibilities for the week ahead in your Expanded Audio Horoscope.

I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR PREVIEW -- an audio report on YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY from now through JANUARY 2013 and beyond. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2012." The cost is $6.

What are your plans for the rest of the year? Could you use some more help in mapping out your dreams and schemes? Maybe you can accomplish more than you think in the next nine months. Tune in.

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Many life processes unfold outside of your conscious awareness: your body digesting your food and circulating your blood; trees using carbon dioxide, water, and sunlight to synthesize their nourishment; microorganisms in the soil beneath your feet endlessly toiling to create humus. You don't perceive any of these things directly; they're invisible to you.

Tune in to this vitalizing alchemy. Use your X-ray vision and sub-sonic hearing and psychic smelling. See if you can absorb by osmosis some of the euphoria of the trees as they soak in the sunlight from above and water from below.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

Check to see if you're having any of the following symptoms: 1. sudden eruptions of gratitude; 2. a declining fascination with conflict; 3. seemingly irrational urges that lead you to interesting discoveries; 4. yearnings to peer more deeply into the eyes of people you care about; 5. a mounting inability to tolerate boring influences that resist transformation; 6. an increasing knack for recognizing and receiving the love that's available to you. If you're experiencing at least three of the six symptoms, you are certifiably in close alignment with the cosmic flow, and should keep doing what you've been doing. If none of these symptoms have been sweeping through you, get yourself adjusted.

Want to go further in exploring the Great Mystery that is your life? I discuss the possibilities for the week ahead in your Expanded Audio Horoscope.

I'm also still offering a MID-YEAR PREVIEW -- an audio report on YOUR LONG-TERM DESTINY from now through JANUARY 2013 and beyond. To hear it, log in through the main page, and then click on the link "Long Term Forecast for Second Half of 2012." The cost is $6.

What are your plans for the rest of the year? Could you use some more help in mapping out your dreams and schemes? Maybe you can accomplish more than you think in the next nine months. Tune in.

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In certain Native American traditions, the hole was a symbol for the female genitalia, through which souls enter this realm. In American scientific lore, a wormhole is a backdoor shortcut between two places in space separated by an astronomical distance. In my personal mythos, those are my two favorite nuances in the archetype of the hole.

When I was a kid I loved to fantasize that I'd obtained a magic hole like the one Bugs Bunny had in the comic books. It was a portable hole that Bugs could take with him everywhere and apply to any barrier he needed to slip through. Once he even managed to slap it up against the sky, giving him access to another dimension where the whole world was inside him, not outside. (Or was that a dream I had?)

What would you do with your portable magic hole?
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.