Free Will Astrology


Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny


Week of May 17th, 2012

♈ ARIES

(March 21-April 19)
Is there a difference in sound quality between relatively inexpensive modern violins and the multi-million-dollar violins created by master craftsmen in the 1700s? In research done at the Eighth International Violin Competition, most violinists couldn't tell them apart. (Read more here.) In accordance with the astrological omens, Aries, I urge you to do comparable tests in your own sphere. There's no need to overpay for anything, either with your money, your emotions, your energy, or your time. Go with what works, not with what costs the most or has highest status.


No one knows you better than you do, but maybe I can help you dig up even more self-knowledge. Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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Composer Robert Schuman had long dialogues with his imaginary friends, Florestan and Eusebius, who provided valuable ideas for his musical scores. W.S. Merwyn wrote a poem in which he recounted the counsel of his teacher John Berryman: "He suggested I pray to the Muse / get down on my knees and pray / right there in the corner and he/ said he meant it literally."

Conjure up an imaginary friend and have an intimate conversation with him or her.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♉ TAURUS

(April 20-May 20)
If we thought of your life as a book, the title of the next chapter could very well be "In Quest of the Primal." I encourage you to meditate on what that means to you, and then act accordingly. Here are a few possibilities: tapping into the mother lode; connecting to the source; communing with the core; returning to beginnings; seeking out the original; being in tune with the pulse of nature. Does any of that sound like fun? According to my reading of the astrological omens, you have a mandate to be as raw as the law allows -- to be the smartest animal you can be.


Wouldn't you love to learn more about who you really are? What better adventure is there than learning about your soul's code? For more hints, listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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Take off your mask. You say you're not wearing a mask? But you are. The muscles of your face are so accustomed to displaying your familiar emotions, they've gotten stuck. Raw new emotions are aching to show themselves, but can't dislodge the incumbents.

Start an exercise program. Gaze into the mirror and make hundreds of rubbery faces. Loosen and tone your muscles. Flush those ancient expressions.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♊ GEMINI

(May 21-June 20)
A Russian woman named Marija Usova decided to go skydiving even though she was eight months pregnant. "I wanted my baby to have the beautiful feeling of flying through the air and free-falling before it was born," she said. Soon after she jumped out of the plane and opened her parachute, she went into labor. Luckily, her daughter waited until she landed to be born. What does this have to do with you? I don't recommend you do anything even remotely like what Usova did in the next few weeks. But do be alert for healthier, saner approaches to the basic theme, which is to be adventurous and wild and free as you birth a new possibility.


I hope the oracle above provides you with the inspiration you need to do what you've got to do and change what needs to be changed. But if you need more clues, listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE, where I go further in exploring your mysteries.

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Nineteenth-century English poet Dante Gabriel Rossetti wrote a series of sensual sonnets inspired by his relationship with his wife Elizabeth. Before he could publish them, Elizabeth died. He was so distraught he placed the only copy of his manuscript in the grave with her. Years later, though, he decided the love poems were too good to consign forever to the oblivion of the dirt. He had the coffin disinterred and recovered his work.

Draw inspiration from Rosetti's change of heart. Reclaim riches you once abandoned or left for dead.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♋ CANCERIAN

(June 21-July 22)
You spend nearly one-third of your life sleeping. For one-fifth of that time, you're dreaming. So pretty much every night, you watch and respond to as much as 90 minutes' worth of movies created by and starring you. Much of this footage is obscure and confusing and not exactly Oscar-worthy, which is one reason you may not recall many of the details when you wake up. But according to my astrological analysis, the immediate future could be different. Your dreams should be full of riveting entertainment that reveals important information about the mysteries of your destiny. Please consider keeping a pen and notebook near your bed, or a small recording device.


For more help in understanding your relationship with the game of life, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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"As soon as you concern yourself with the 'good' and 'bad' of your fellows," said Morihei Ueshiba, founder of the martial art of aikido, "you create an opening in your heart for maliciousness to enter. Testing, competing with, and criticizing others weaken and defeat you."

Make that your hypothesis. Proceed according to the theory that you can feed your strength and power and freedom by accepting other people just the way they are. Assume that one of the surest ways to be happy and successful is to refrain from judging anyone.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♌ LEO

(July 23-August 22)
It's Oxymoron Season for you. That means you're likely to encounter more than your usual share of sweet and sour paradoxes. The logic-loving areas of your brain will almost certainly have to seek assistance from your non-rational wisdom. I'll give you a heads-up on some of the lucid riddles you should be ready to embrace: 1. a humbling triumph; 2. a tender rivalry; 3. a selfish blessing; 4. an opportunity to commune with risky comfort; 5. an invitation to explore a relaxing challenge; 6. a chance to get up-close and personal with a long-distance connection. For best results, Leo, memorize these lines from Walt Whitman's Leaves of Grass and recite them periodically: "Do I contradict myself? / Very well then I contradict myself. / (I am large, I contain multitudes.)"


Would you like further inspiration as you scheme and dream to make the most of life's sometimes puzzling opportunities? Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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Thomas Paine was a zealous revolutionary. He wrote incendiary pamphlets that helped ignite and sustain America's struggle for independence from Great Britain in the 18th century.

Early in his life, however, he worked making women's girdles, which are among the most constrictive and oppressive garments in the history of the world. Was there a connection between his two gigs? Maybe his later struggle for liberation was an unconscious atonement for his youthful labors.

Instigate a Thomas Paine-like boomerang. Think of something you did in the past that constricted your spirit or squeezed other people's possibilities. Use that memory as a launching pad as you unleash a brilliant stroke in the name of abundance and expansiveness.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♍ VIRGO

(August 23-September 22)
There's at least a 50 percent chance that the coming days will be over-the-top, out-of-the-blue, and off-the-record. I'm half-expecting florid, luscious, and kaleidoscopic events, possibly even rococo, swashbuckling, and splendiferous adventures. Are you ready for all this? Of course not. That's the point life will be trying to make: nudging you to learn more about the fine art of spontaneity as you improvise your way through unpredictable lessons that will lead you toward the resources you'll need to succeed.


What exactly are you looking for? How would you describe the experiences you want more than anything else? It's possible my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE could give you additional help in figuring that out.

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Growing up in Montreal, musician Rufus Wainwright was steeped in the mystique of that city's legendary songwriter Leonard Cohen. Although too feisty a spirit to engage in idol-worship, Wainwright was at least slightly in awe.

As a young adult, he finally got to meet Cohen, whose daughter brought him to the great man's family home. When Wainwright walked into the kitchen, Cohen was in his underwear cooking up tiny sausages, which he was chewing, regurgitating, and feeding to a weak baby bird he had found and was trying to revive. (Source: the film I'm Your Man)
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♎ LIBRA

(September 23-October 22)
Obsessions. Enchantments. Crushes. Manias. Fetishes. Some astrologers think you Libras are mostly immune from these indelicate but sometimes delightful modes of human expression. They seem to believe that you love harmony and balance too much to fall under the spell of a bewitching passion that rivets your focus. I disagree with that view. It may be true that you're better able than the other signs to be objective about your fixations. But that doesn't necessarily dilute the intensity you feel when they rise up and captivate your imagination with the force of a thousand love songs. My advice? Have fun and stay amused.


Want to hear more about the subconscious factors and hidden forces that may be influencing your life? Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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Computer programmer Garry Hamilton articulated the following "Game Rules." Give examples of how they have worked in your life.

1. If the game is rigged so you can't win, find another game or invent your own.
2. If you're not winning because you don't know the rules, learn the rules.
3. If you know the rules but aren't willing to follow them, there's either something wrong with the game or you need to change something in yourself.
4. Don't play the game in a half-baked way. Either get all the way in or all the way out.
5. It shouldn't be necessary for others to lose in order for you to win. If others have to lose, re-evaluate the game's goals.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♏ SCORPIO

(October 23-November 21)
"The chains that bind us most closely are the ones we have broken," said Scorpio poet Antonio Porchia. In other words, the oppression from which we have freed ourselves may continue to influence us long after we've escaped. The imprint it left on our sensitive psyches might keep distorting our decisions and twisting our emotions. But I'm here to tell you, Scorpio, that you're entering a time when you have an enhanced power to dissolve the lingering taint your broken chains still impose. You finally have the resources and wisdom to complete the liberation process.


To further explore the ripening blessings and interesting challenges in your life, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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When he's in his prime, a male panda performs an average of eight handstands a day. There's no apparent evolutionary purpose in this stunt. Maybe he does it because it feels good.

Make him your role model. Identify three activities you can do not because they're "good for you" or because they'll advance some goal you're pursuing, but simply for the sheer fun of it.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♐ SAGITTARIUS

(November 22-December 21)
In the coming weeks, you will have an excellent chance to develop more skill in the art of high gossip. High gossip has almost nothing in common with the mindless prattle that erodes reputations and fosters cynicism. It's not driven by envy, pettiness, or schadenfreude. When you engage in high gossip, you spread uplifting whispers and inspirational hearsay; you speculate about people's talents and call attention to their successes; you conspire to awaken generosity of spirit and practical idealism. High gossip is a righteous approach to chatting about the human zoo. It might not flow as easily as the cheap and shabby kind -- at least at first -- but it lasts a whole lot longer and creates connections that help keep your mental hygiene sparkling clean.


Need more whacks applied to your mental blocks? More caresses bestowed upon your growing edge? Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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Charles Darwin said the "survival of the fittest" is a central factor in the process of evolution. What exactly did he mean by that? He makes it clear in his book The Origin of Species: "It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the ones most responsive to change."

According to Darwin's definition, what would you have to do to make yourself superbly fit?
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♑ CAPRICORN

(December 22-January 19)
Sometimes I have a dream that seems cryptic or meaningless when I first wake up, but a few days later I realize it was a brilliant insight into what I most needed to transform about my life. If you don't recall many of your dreams, that might not be a familiar experience for you. But you've probably had waking-life experiences with a similar arc. I predict you will be given at least one of those in the coming week. It may confound you while you're in the midst of it, but will eventually reveal choice clues that have the power to change your life for the better.


Where do you want to go? Who do you want to be? For more clues, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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During a trip to Europe, New York poet Stephen Ben Israel performed Re-Blessing Ceremonies in venerable cathedrals and synagogues. His primary sacramental act was to smoke a joint and invoke a visceral awareness of the Divine Intelligence. In so doing, he aspired to reanimate those sterile sanctuaries, where over the years so many worshipers have brought only their inert concepts and habit-encrusted beliefs.

Carry out your own version of a Re-Blessing Ceremony in a once-sacred place that has lost its juice.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♒ AQUARIUS

(January 20- February 18)
You may not have heard about the "forbidden colors." And you certainly haven't seen them, even though they exist. They're reddish green and yellowish blue, which the cells of your retina are not built to register. However, scientists have figured out a trick by which these hues can be made visible. A few lucky people have actually caught a glimpse of them. I bring this to your attention, Aquarius, because I suspect you are close to experiencing a metaphorical version of this breakthrough -- seeing something that is supposedly impossible to see. (If you'd like to read more about the forbidden colors, go here.)


Would you like to hear me say some more about your ever-evolving destiny? Check out your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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Qabalist teacher Ann Davies told a story about a U.S. Army general negotiating with a cannibal chief in New Guinea during World War II. The general wanted the chief to rally his tribe to help American troops fight the Japanese. The chief refused, calling the Americans immoral. The general was shocked. "We are not immoral!" he protested. "The Japanese are immoral!" The cannibal chief replied, "The Japanese and Americans are equally immoral. You both kill far more people than you can eat."

Using this tale as your impetus, describe how parts of your moral code may not be rooted in an absolute standard of what's good and evil, but rather bound by the idiosyncrasies of your culture and historical era.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♓ PISCES

(February 19-March 20)
"There's no such thing as a wrong note," said jazz pianist Art Tatum. "It all depends on how you resolve it." Jazz trumpeter Miles Davis had a similar philosophy. "It's not the note you play that's the wrong note," he said. "It's the note you play afterwards that makes it right or wrong." I think that's an excellent understanding for you to keep in mind during the coming weeks, Pisces. Be wary of coming to premature conclusions about alleged mistakes. Wait to hear the entire song and see the bigger picture.


Need more help deciphering the riddles and enigmas that are fueling your amazing story? Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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Build a plush orphanage in Minsk
Feel sorry for a devious lawyer
Rebel against your horoscope
Give yourself another chance
Write your autohagiography
Play games with no rules
Teach animals to dance
Trick your nightmares
Relax and go deeper
Dream like stones
Mock your fears
Drink the sun
Suck gravity
Sing love
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

© Rob Brezsny 1995-2019