I love how the poet Rachel Loden describes her impressions of Daniel Borzutzky's The Book of Interfering Bodies. She says that reading it is like "chancing upon a secret lake full of trembling lilies that projectile vomit both poems and petroleum." I call this imaginary scene to your attention, Aries, because I'm wondering if you might encounter a metaphorically similar landscape in the coming week. The astrological omens suggest that you're attracted to that kind of strange beauty, surreal intensity, and tenderness mixed with ferocity.

Do you want further explorations of the intriguing twists and turns of your personal evolution? Would you like help in solving the riddles that confuse you? Check out your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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Dear Beauty and Truth Lab: I was wondering if you had any information about Beyonders, people who were born under no star and who are therefore not ruled by the stars. - Wannabe Beyonder

Dear Wannabe: It's impossible to be born under no star. However, we all go through periods when we're relatively free from the authority of the stars we were born under and therefore immune from cosmic compulsion. During these times, we're less susceptible to the whims of fate and the demands of the past and the inertia of karma. Our willpower has more breathing room, and we're more likely to fulfill Einstein's dictum, "Imagination is more important than knowledge."
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

This would be an excellent time to ripen and fine-tune your independence. Would you be willing to try some experiments in self-sufficiency that would inspire you to love yourself better? Is there anything you could do to upgrade your mastery of taking good care of yourself? By working on your relationship with yourself, you will set in motion a magic that will make you even more attractive to others than you already are.

Need more help in figuring out the questions life is asking you? Crave more support in your efforts to build your courage? Check out your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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Of the many things that have gone right for you during your time on Earth, the most crucial was your birth. As you crossed over the threshold, trading the warm dark sanctuary for the bright noisy enigma, you didn't die! It was a difficult act of high magic that involved many people who worked very hard in your behalf. The skills they provided in helping you navigate your rite of passage were in turn made possible by previous generations of threshold-tenders who bequeathed their expertise.

Months before that initiation, a more secret miracle bloomed: Your life began as a single cell, spawned by the explosive fusion of two highly specialized bundles of chromosomes. How could that tiny package of raw material have possibly grown a brain and liver and heart and stomach over a period of a few months? What inscrutable genius guided and oversaw the emergence of your fully formed infant body, that virtuoso creation, from the slimmest of clues?
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

Even if you don't usually consider yourself a matchmaker, you could be a pretty good one in the coming week. That's because you will have more insight than usual about how to combine things in harmonious and evocative ways. In fact, I suspect you will possess a sixth sense about which fragments might fit together to create synergistic wholes. Take maximum advantage of this knack, Gemini. Use it to build connections between parts of your psyche and elements of your world that have not been in close enough touch lately.

What fresh blessings will life bring you? What questions should you be asking? To explore the ripening trends further, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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You can drink a glass of water. You can spread butter on a slice of toast. You can wash your hair and prune your plants and draw infinity signs on a piece of paper. Your hands work wonderfully well! Their intricate force and sustained grace are amply supported by your heart, which circulates your blood all the way out to replenish the energy of the muscles and nerves in your fingers and palms and wrists. After your blood has delivered its blessings, it finds its way back to your heart to be refreshed. This masterful mystery repeats itself over and over again without you ever having to think about it.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

You already know what you need to know in order to make the dicey, spicey transition, Cancerian. Even more amazingly, you already have what you need. But for some reason, you don't trust what you know and don't believe you have what you need. So you're still in a fretful mode, hunting far and wide for the magic key that you think still eludes you. I'm here to persuade you to stop gazing longingly into the distance and stop assuming that help is far away. Look underfoot. Check with what's right in front of you.

Want to explore this chapter of your life story even further? Dig deeper? Push harder? Consider tuning in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES.

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Your imagination may be the best gift you've been given. It's the source of your creative power. If there's a particular experience or object you want to bring into your life, the first thing you've got to do is visualize it. The practical actions you take to manifest your dreams always refer back to the pictures in your mind's eye. And so every goal you fulfill, every quest you carry out, begins as an inner vision. Your imagination is the engine of your destiny. It's the catalyst with which you design your future. Do you know where it comes from? Do you have any idea how powerful it is?
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

During my years as a singer in rock bands, I've had a theatrical approach to performing. On some occasions, I arrive on stage from the back of the club. Dressed in leather and rags and witchdoctor finery, with a rainbow of fake eagle feathers splayed from my coiffure, I climb into a grocery cart, stand up like a politician giving the V for Victory sign with my outstretched arms, and have my bandmates wheel me through the crowd. I highly recommend that you arrange to make an equally splashy entrance in the near future, Leo. Picture yourself arriving at your workplace or classroom or favorite cafe in resplendent glory, maybe even carried on a litter or throne (or in a grocery cart) by your entourage. It would be an excellent way to get yourself in rapt alignment with this week's flashy, self-celebratory vibes.

You're got more strength and intelligence than you realize. For help in accessing those untapped inner resources, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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May you eat an unfamiliar dessert in a strange land at least once every three years.

May you wake up to salsa music one summer morning and start dancing while you're still half-­asleep.

May you spray-paint Rilke poems as graffiti on highway overpasses.

May you mix stripes with plaids, floral patterns with checks, and yellowish-green with brownish-purple.

May you learn to identify by name 20 flowers, 15 trees, 10 clouds and one extrasolar planet.

May you put a bumper sticker on your car or bike that says, "My god can kick your god's ass!"

If you bury your face in your tear-stained pillow and beg God to please send you your soul mate, may you not slur your words in such a way that they sound like "cell mate."

May you dream of taking a trip to the moon in a gondola powered by firecrackers and wild swans.

May you actually kiss the earth now and then.

May you find many good excuses to say, as physicist Niels Bohr once did, "Your theory is crazy, but it's not crazy enough to be true."
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

When I was 19 years old, I was wounded by a shotgun-wielding assailant on the campus of Duke University. A few years ago, I revisited the scene of the crime. For two hours I sat there meditating on the exact spot where I'd been shot. Among the questions I pondered was this: Had there been any benefits that came out of that difficult event? The answer was a definitive YES. I identified several wonderful developments that happened specifically because of how my destiny was altered by the shooting. For instance, I met three lifelong friends I would not have otherwise encountered. My challenge to you, Virgo, is to think back on a dark moment from your past and do what I did: Find the redemption. (Read my full story here.)

How are you going to change what needs to be changed and accept what needs to be accepted? To get some support from me, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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Have you ever been loved? I bet you have been loved so much and so deeply that you have become blasé about the enormity of the grace it confers. So let me remind you: To be loved is a privilege and prize equivalent to being born. If you're smart, you pause regularly to bask in the astonishing knowledge that there are many people out there who care for you and want you to thrive and hold you in their thoughts with fondness.

Animals, too: You have been the recipient of their boundless affection. The spirits of allies who've left this world continue to send their tender regards, as well. Do you "believe" in angels and other divine beings? Whether or not you do, I can assure you that there are hordes of them beaming their uncanny consecrations your way. You are awash in torrents of love.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

In her multi-platinum song "Tik Tok," pop star Ke$ha claims that she brushes her teeth with whiskey -- Jack Daniels, to be exact. In interviews, she has said this is not a glamorous fiction or rhetorical device; she really does it. "Jack Daniels is an anti-bacterial," she told Vanity Fair. You might want to experiment with rituals like that yourself, Libra. At least for the next two weeks or so, it wouldn't be totally crazy to keep yourself more or less permanently in a party mood. Why not prep yourself for unfettered fun from the moment the day begins? From an astrological perspective, you need and deserve a phase of intense revelry.

Sometimes it's a challenge to try to figure out what's important and what's not important. If you'd like more of my input, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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Imagine you're with a team of explorers in Antarctica. You're climbing the 2,000-foot granite spire called Rakekniven that thrusts up out of the ice in Queen Maud Land. The temperature is 10 degrees below zero. There's not a plant or animal in sight. The blinding white emptiness of the wasteland beneath you fills you with desolate reverence, alienated awe, and soaring gratitude. You are far from everything that normally gives you comfort.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

English raconteur Quentin Crisp told the story of a veteran Hollywood film actor giving advice to a younger actor just getting started. "You're at a level where you can only afford one mistake," the wise older man said. "The higher up you go, the more mistakes you're allowed. Right at the top, if you make enough of them, it's considered to be your style." I think this perspective is perfect for you to meditate on, Scorpio. The time is ripe to fuel your ambitions and gain more traction in your chosen field. And one of the goals driving you as you do this should be the quest for a greater freedom to play around and experiment and risk making blunders.

How well is your imagination working these days? Could it use a boost? A prod? A jolt of inspiration? Try tuning in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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Breathe more like a wild boar and less like a parakeet. Act more like an unfathomable game with no time limit and less like a puzzle with just a few last pieces missing. Shimmer more like the aurora borealis in the early morning sky and less like a furnace heating a mansion. See more like a panther sees and less like your first teacher. Write more fat messages in the mist on the glass, and speak less about the skinny facts you know by heart. Eat more magic cookies and less brain candy.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

I have regular intimate communion with the Divine Wow (formerly known as "God"). Whether I "believe" in my Dear Companion is irrelevant -- just as I don't need to "believe" in a juicy Fuji apple while I'm eating it. That's why atheists seem to me like goofy kooks, as fundamentalist in their own way as evangelical Christians. They have absolute, unshakable faith that there's no such thing as our Big Wild Friend. Agnostics I can understand better; they're like pre-orgasmic virgins who are at least open to the possibility of getting the full treatment. I offer these comments as a prelude to my prediction for you, Sagittarius, which is that you will soon have a very good chance to get up-close and personal with the Divine Wow. (If that offends you because you're an atheist, no worry. Nothing bad will happen if you turn down the invitation.)

Want more clues? Need further insight? For more evocative questions and pithy suggestions about your unfolding destiny, check out your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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Try this meditation: Imagine that you are the wood and the fire that consumes the wood.

First, focus your awareness on the part of you that is the wood. You may tremble or gasp, feeling the jolt of your solidity disintegrating, your form changing. As you shift your attention to the part of you that is the fire, you may exult in the wild joy of power and liberation.

It may be tempting to favor the fire over the wood, to love the burning more than the being burned. But if you'd like to understand pronoia in its fullness, you've got to appreciate them equally. Can you imagine yourself being the fire and wood simultaneously? Is it possible for you to experience the deep pleasure of their collaboration?
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

For more than 11 years, a New Jersey man named Jesus Leonardo earned an annual salary of about $45,000 by gathering up and cashing in horse-racing tickets that had been accidentally thrown away by the people who bought them. (Read more.) I suggest we make him your role model and patron saint for the coming weeks. Like him, you are in line to capitalize on discarded riches and unappreciated assets. Be on the lookout for the treasure hidden in the trash.

How much do you want to know about your life? How far do you dare to go in your quest for self-mastery? For more insight into your intriguing fate, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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One of life's bounties is its changeableness, which ensures that boredom will never last very long. You may underestimate the intensity of your longing for continual transformation, but the universe doesn't. That's why it provides you with the boundless entertainment of your ever-shifting story. That's why it is always revising the challenges it sends your way, providing your curious soul with a rich variety of unpredictable teachings.

Neuroscientists have turned up evidence that suggests you love this aspect of the universe's behavior. They say that you are literally addicted to learning. At the moment when you grasp a lesson you've been grappling with, your brain experiences a rush of a natural opium-like chemical, boosting your pleasure levels. You crave this experience. You thrive on it.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

You're now in a phase of your long-term cycle when life will be extra responsive to your vivacious curiosity. That's why I encourage you to ask riveting questions. Ask whom? God, if that's your style; your higher self, if that works better; or sources of wisdom and vitality you respect, if you prefer that. Here are four queries to get you started: 1. "What is the most magnificent gift I can give to life in the next three years?" 2. "How can I become more powerful in a way that's safe and wise?" 3. "How can I cultivate my relationships so that they thrive even as my life keeps changing?" 4. "What can I do that will help me get all the love I need?"

Would you like to hear more about the hidden factors influencing your life? Do you want to uncover the secrets you've been hiding even from yourself? Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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The phrase "new roses" can serve as an antidote to neurosis -- as a kind of magical spell. You might invoke it when you're in danger of getting undermined by either your own neurosis or someone else's.

If you notice, for instance, that your subconscious mind is spiraling down into a sour fantasy stirred up by one of your habitual fears, you could mutter a cheerful round of "new roses, new roses, new roses."

If your allies slip into the same compulsive behavior that they tend to get stuck in whenever stress overflows, you could chant "new roses, new roses, new roses" in a tuneful, affectionate tone.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

I was considering the possibility of getting me and my family members those GPS devices that allow you to locate your car if you've forgotten where you parked it. But then I had second thoughts. Wouldn't that be one additional thing encouraging us to let our memories atrophy? The conveniences that technology provides are wonderful, but at a certain point don't they start threatening to weaken our brain functions? I invite you to meditate on this issue, Pisces. It's time to have a talk with yourself about anything -- gadgets, comforts, habits -- that might be dampening your willpower, compromising your mental acuity, or rendering you passive.

Do you wish you could get more clarity about the foggy, ambiguous situations you're dealing with? Want more help in exploring the Great Mystery that is your life? I discuss your coming week in greater depth in your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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Thousands of things go right for you every day, beginning the moment you wake up. Through some magic you don't fully understand, you're still breathing and your heart is beating, even though you've been unconscious for many hours. The air is a mix of gases that's just right for your body's needs, as it was before you fell asleep.

You can see! Light of many colors floods into your eyes, registered by nerves that took God or evolution or some process millions of years to perfect. The interesting gift of these vivid hues is made possible by an unimaginably immense globe of fire, the sun, which continually detonates nuclear reactions in order to convert its own body into light and heat and energy for your personal use.
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The preceding oracle comes from my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.