Free Will Astrology


Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny


Week of December 24th, 2009

♈ ARIES

(March 21-April 19)
What influences do you really, really need to say goodbye to? The next six months will provide you with ample motivation and opportunity to finally bid those farewells. What long-term cycle really, really needs to be drawn to a close, no more hemming and hawing, all loose ends tied up and all mixed signals clarified? Again, the time between now and the middle of June will bring you the necessary inspiration to make it happen. But it'll take deep thought and sustained work and an expanded sense of humor, so get started soon.


This week my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES offer you a teaser look at some of the major themes you will be working and playing with in 2010. Then, beginning December 29, I will devote three consecutive weeks of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES to an in-depth discussion of your long-range outlook for the coming 12 months. Tune in!

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Charles Darwin said the "survival of the fittest" is a central factor in the process of evolution. What exactly did he mean by that? He makes it clear in his book The Origin of Species: "It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the ones most responsive to change."

According to Darwin's definition, what would you have to do to make yourself superbly fit?
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♉ TAURUS

(April 20-May 20)
According to astronomer Mark Whittle, the Big Bang began in silence. Soon it crescendoed into a majestic major third chord 50 octaves below middle A. Then it transformed, over the course of a million years, into a wistful minor third chord. In my vision of the first two-thirds of 2010, the music of your life will have a similar pattern: It begins with silence. Next, it progresses into a lush major feel, with spirited and complex contrapuntal themes. Then in June, it evolves into a dreamy, contemplative phase. By late September, however -- unlike the Big Bang -- you will move into a third act, in which the music of your life returns to the lively mood it had at the start, only now with the gravitas that the reflective phase has instilled.


This week my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES offer you a teaser look at some of the major themes you will be working and playing with in 2010. Then, beginning December 29, I will devote three consecutive weeks of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES to an in-depth discussion of your long-range outlook for the coming 12 months. Tune in!

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During a trip to Europe, New York poet Stephen Ben Israel performed Re-Blessing Ceremonies in venerable cathedrals and synagogues. His primary sacramental act was to smoke a joint and invoke a visceral awareness of the Divine Intelligence. In so doing, he aspired to reanimate those sterile sanctuaries, where over the years so many worshipers have brought only their inert concepts and habit-encrusted beliefs.

Carry out your own version of a Re-Blessing Ceremony in a once-sacred place that has lost its juice.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♊ GEMINI

(May 21-June 20)
I have good astrological reasons to suspect that a year from now, your empire will be bigger. The resources you have at your disposal will be more substantial, the influence you wield will be more meaningful, and the responsibilities you oversee will be more demanding. You can't, however, just sit back passively and expect fate to make it all happen for you. You will have to work your assets off: get better organized, clarify your game plan, and commit to taking better care of yourself. None of that is mandatory, of course. Being a lazy wanderer with no mission statement is definitely an option. If you do go in that direction, though, don't complain to me next December about how you feel like you're made of cookie dough.


This week my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES offer you a teaser look at some of the major themes you will be working and playing with in 2010. Then, beginning December 29, I will devote three consecutive weeks of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES to an in-depth discussion of your long-range outlook for the coming 12 months. Tune in!

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Qabalist teacher Ann Davies told a story about a U.S. Army general negotiating with a cannibal chief in New Guinea during World War II. The general wanted the chief to rally his tribe to help American troops fight the Japanese. The chief refused, calling the Americans immoral. The general was shocked. "We are not immoral!" he protested. "The Japanese are immoral!" The cannibal chief replied, "The Japanese and Americans are equally immoral. You both kill far more people than you can eat."

Using this tale as your impetus, describe how parts of your moral code may not be rooted in an absolute standard of what's good and evil, but rather bound by the idiosyncrasies of your culture and historical era.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♋ CANCERIAN

(June 21-July 22)
You will need to learn a lot in 2010, Cancerian. You'll be in a phase of your long-term cycle when it will be wise to enhance your problem-solving skills and increase the knowledge you have at your disposal. So let me ask you: What can you do to gently shock yourself into prying open your mind? What is it that you don't know but need to know? By the way, the coming year will also be a good time for you to offer yourself up as a teacher. In fact, sharing your knowledge and problem-solving skills will make you more receptive to what you need to learn.


This week my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES offer you a teaser look at some of the major themes you will be working and playing with in 2010. Then, beginning December 29, I will devote three consecutive weeks of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES to an in-depth discussion of your long-range outlook for the coming 12 months. Tune in!

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Every act of genius, Carl Jung said, is an act contra naturam: against nature. Indeed, every effort to achieve psychological integration and union with the divine requires a knack for working against the grain. The eighteenth-century mystic Jacob Boehme recommended the same technique. The great secret to becoming enlightened, he said, is "to walk in all things contrary to the world." Qabalist teacher Paul Foster Case agreed: "The basis of the spiritual approach to life, the foundation of the everyday practice of a person who lives the life of obedience to esoteric law, is the reversal of the more usual ways of thinking, speaking and doing."

What exactly were they talking about? Give specific examples.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♌ LEO

(July 23-August 22)
Do you know any world travelers, shamanic healers, or visionary entrepreneurs? If not, there's a good chance you'll meet some in 2010, possibly even forge alliances with them. Crafty activists, brilliant artists, and deep thinkers may come your way, as well. Another possibility is that cohorts and comrades you've been linked to for some time will embark on mind-expanding quests that blow your mind as well as theirs. One way or another, Leo, the coming year will bring you more than the usual benefits and challenges that come from being in relationships.


This week my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES offer you a teaser look at some of the major themes you will be working and playing with in 2010. Then, beginning December 29, I will devote three consecutive weeks of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES to an in-depth discussion of your long-range outlook for the coming 12 months. Tune in!

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
Composer Robert Schuman had long dialogues with his imaginary friends, Florestan and Eusebius, who provided valuable ideas for his musical scores. W.S. Merwyn wrote a poem in which he recounted the counsel of his teacher John Berryman: "He suggested I pray to the Muse / get down on my knees and pray / right there in the corner and he/ said he meant it literally."

Conjure up an imaginary friend and have an intimate conversation with him or her.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♍ VIRGO

(August 23-September 22)
I was in my first rock band in North Carolina in the 1970s. We did a mix of cover tunes by David Bowie, Lou Reed, and Patti Smith, plus original hippie-punk songs and my poetry rants. Controversy arose virtually every time we performed, especially in places like the North Carolina State Fair in Raleigh (where we competed with the cacophony of mooing cows) and frat parties (where we endured the shouted insults of drunken jocks). It wasn't until I moved to California that I synced up with an audience that appreciated my idiosyncratic musical sensibilities. According to my reading of the omens, Virgo, 2010 could bring you a comparable transition: finding listeners or hooking up with collaborators who are a better fit for your unique qualities.


This week my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES offer you a teaser look at some of the major themes you will be working and playing with in 2010. Then, beginning December 29, I will devote three consecutive weeks of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES to an in-depth discussion of your long-range outlook for the coming 12 months. Tune in!

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
Take off your mask. You say you're not wearing a mask? But you are. The muscles of your face are so accustomed to displaying your familiar emotions, they've gotten stuck. Raw new emotions are aching to show themselves, but can't dislodge the incumbents.

Start an exercise program. Gaze into the mirror and make hundreds of rubbery faces. Loosen and tone your muscles. Flush those ancient expressions.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♎ LIBRA

(September 23-October 22)
I'm always befuddled by astrologers who preach the gospel of doom and gloom when they talk about the influence of Saturn. My experience is that the ringed planet provides the greatest gift imaginable: motivation to become the person you were born to be. It steers you away from pursuing goals that aren't in alignment with your soul's code. It pressures you to give up vain fantasies that even if fulfilled wouldn't make you happy. That's why I'm happy to report to you the following good news: As Saturn travels through your sign for much of the time between now and October 2012, I expect that you will be prompted and prodded to cut away the irrelevancies that distract you from claiming your birthright.


This week my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES offer you a teaser look at some of the major themes you will be working and playing with in 2010. Then, beginning December 29, I will devote three consecutive weeks of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES to an in-depth discussion of your long-range outlook for the coming 12 months. Tune in!

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
Nineteenth-century English poet Dante Gabriel Rossetti wrote a series of sensual sonnets inspired by his relationship with his wife Elizabeth. Before he could publish them, Elizabeth died. He was so distraught he placed the only copy of his manuscript in the grave with her. Years later, though, he decided the love poems were too good to consign forever to the oblivion of the dirt. He had the coffin disinterred and recovered his work.

Draw inspiration from Rosetti's change of heart. Reclaim riches you once abandoned or left for dead.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♏ SCORPIO

(October 23-November 21)
Comedian Chris Rock has a joke that plays on the stereotypes about your sign: "Most Scorpios die while they're making love!" (Only he uses the f-word instead of "making love.") I understand the source of his satire. There are more than a few grains of truth in the notion that Scorpios revel in the enigmas of eros and death. On the other hand, I wouldn't reduce your mystique to such a simple formula. I'd prefer to say something like this: You're sexy when you're letting go of your staunch self-control. Or: You're an expert at transcending humdrum modes of awareness by stimulating intense pleasure. Or: If fully harnessed, your orgasmic power could kill off any destructive compulsions you might be harboring. And by the way, 2010 will be one of the best years ever for you to cash in on these capacities.


This week my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES offer you a teaser look at some of the major themes you will be working and playing with in 2010. Then, beginning December 29, I will devote three consecutive weeks of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES to an in-depth discussion of your long-range outlook for the coming 12 months. Tune in!

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
"As soon as you concern yourself with the 'good' and 'bad' of your fellows," said Morihei Ueshiba, founder of the martial art of aikido, "you create an opening in your heart for maliciousness to enter. Testing, competing with, and criticizing others weaken and defeat you."

Make that your hypothesis. Proceed according to the theory that you can feed your strength and power and freedom by accepting other people just the way they are. Assume that one of the surest ways to be happy and successful is to refrain from judging anyone.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♐ SAGITTARIUS

(November 22-December 21)
According to my analysis of your astrological omens, 2010 isn't a year to get your head in the clouds, but rather to grow deeper roots. Your job, as I see it, isn't so much to explore the heights, but the depths. I think you should focus on getting to the bottom of things, not the top. Your instrument of choice should be a microscope, not a telescope. Your specialty won't be playing spectacular guitar solos but rather groovalicious bass lines.


This week my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES offer you a teaser look at some of the major themes you will be working and playing with in 2010. Then, beginning December 29, I will devote three consecutive weeks of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES to an in-depth discussion of your long-range outlook for the coming 12 months. Tune in!

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Thomas Paine was a zealous revolutionary. He wrote incendiary pamphlets that helped ignite and sustain America's struggle for independence from Great Britain in the 18th century.

Early in his life, however, he worked making women's girdles, which are among the most constrictive and oppressive garments in the history of the world. Was there a connection between his two gigs? Maybe his later struggle for liberation was an unconscious atonement for his youthful labors.

Instigate a Thomas Paine-like boomerang. Think of something you did in the past that constricted your spirit or squeezed other people's possibilities. Use that memory as a launching pad as you unleash a brilliant stroke in the name of abundance and expansiveness.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♑ CAPRICORN

(December 22-January 19)
I'm happy to announce that 2010 could be the year when you become a more expert communicator. It's not that you do a bad job now; it's just that there is always room for improvement, and this will be an excellent time to attend to that. Life will be bringing you an abundance of experiences that will help you learn to listen better, cultivate more tact, read people's body language like a pro, and consistently speak about the elusive truth with language that's both kind and effective.


This week my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES offer you a teaser look at some of the major themes you will be working and playing with in 2010. Then, beginning December 29, I will devote three consecutive weeks of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES to an in-depth discussion of your long-range outlook for the coming 12 months. Tune in!

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Growing up in Montreal, musician Rufus Wainwright was steeped in the mystique of that city's legendary songwriter Leonard Cohen. Although too feisty a spirit to engage in idol-worship, Wainwright was at least slightly in awe.

As a young adult, he finally got to meet Cohen, whose daughter brought him to the great man's family home. When Wainwright walked into the kitchen, Cohen was in his underwear cooking up tiny sausages, which he was chewing, regurgitating, and feeding to a weak baby bird he had found and was trying to revive. (Source: the film I'm Your Man)

Are you, too, willing and able to have your fantasies confounded?
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♒ AQUARIUS

(January 20- February 18)
I've known some practical, sensible, well-grounded Aquarians in my life. They're outnumbered, though, by the dominant sub-type of your tribe: the imaginative, idiosyncratic improvisers with lightning reflexes and high-flying notions. But even if you belong to the latter group, in 2010 you'll be gaining the capacities of the former. In fact, I think this will be the year you get more things done than you ever have before. Attention to detail will be your specialty. You're likely to excel in mastering the part of genius that's comprised of 98 percent perspiration.


This week my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES offer you a teaser look at some of the major themes you will be working and playing with in 2010. Then, beginning December 29, I will devote three consecutive weeks of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES to an in-depth discussion of your long-range outlook for the coming 12 months. Tune in!

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
Computer programmer Garry Hamilton articulated the following "Game Rules." Give examples of how they have worked in your life.

1. If the game is rigged so you can't win, find another game or invent your own.
2. If you're not winning because you don't know the rules, learn the rules.
3. If you know the rules but aren't willing to follow them, there's either something wrong with the game or you need to change something in yourself.
4. Don't play the game in a half-baked way. Either get all the way in or all the way out.
5. It shouldn't be necessary for others to lose in order for you to win. If others have to lose, re-evaluate the game's goals.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

♓ PISCES

(February 19-March 20)
The pop star Pink is a successful singer. Not only does she have a great voice; she has also sold 32 million records and won two Grammies. Recently she added what I think is an extraneous element to her live performances: a trapeze act. At the MTV Video Music Awards last September, she delivered her song "Sober" while swinging through the air and hanging upside down 60 feet off the ground. I was perplexed as I watched her, thinking to myself, "Doesn't she have confidence that her song and her singing can stand alone?" In 2010, Pisces, I urge you not to follow her lead. There's no need for you to go way overboard as you try too hard to give too much. Just sing your songs.


This week my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES offer you a teaser look at some of the major themes you will be working and playing with in 2010. Then, beginning December 29, I will devote three consecutive weeks of EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES to an in-depth discussion of your long-range outlook for the coming 12 months. Tune in!

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When he's in his prime, a male panda performs an average of eight handstands a day. There's no apparent evolutionary purpose in this stunt. Maybe he does it because it feels good.

Make him your role model. Identify three activities you can do not because they're "good for you" or because they'll advance some goal you're pursuing, but simply for the sheer fun of it.
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

© Rob Brezsny 1995-2019