Free Will Astrology


Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny


Week of November 12th, 2009

♈ ARIES

(March 21-April 19)
A whitewash happens when you use deceit to cover up the messy facts about a situation. A blackwash is just the opposite: It's when you invoke candor as you reveal complications that have previously been veiled. According to my analysis of the astrological omens, the coming weeks will be prime time to enjoy a jubilee of blackwashing. But I suggest that you proceed gently. Remember that not all hidden information is a sign of malfeasance or evil intentions. Sometimes the truth is so paradoxical and nuanced, it's hard to get it completely out in the open all at once. And sometimes people are motivated to keep things secret mostly because they're afraid to cause pain.


Want to hear more about the subconscious factors and hidden forces that are influencing your life? Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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While you and I are together here:

Your favorite phrase is flux gusto

The colors of your soul are sable, vermilion, ivory, and jade

Your magic talisman is a thousand-year-old Joshua tree whose flowers blossom just one night each year and can only be pollinated by the yucca moth

Your holiest pain comes from your yearning to change yourself in the exact way you'd like the world around you to change

Your soil of destiny is peat moss

Your mythic symbol is a treasure chest dislodged from its hiding place in the earth by a flood

Your lucky number is 13 to the 13th power

Your sweet spot is in between the true believers and the scoffing skeptics

A clutch of frog eggs from an unpolluted river is your auspicious hair-care product

The anonymous celebrity with whom you have most in common is the jester who followed Buddha around and kept him loose

The question that perks you up when your routine becomes too rote is this: What possesses the bar-tailed godwit to migrate annually from Alaska to New Zealand by hitching rides on gale-force winds?
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The preceding oracle comes from the revised and expanded edition of my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. You can order it at Amazon or Barnes & Noble.

♉ TAURUS

(April 20-May 20)
"Dear Rob: I've read horoscope columns written by many astrologers, and yours is the only one that's not prejudiced against at least one of the signs. You really do treat everyone equally. You play no favorites. But that's exactly the bone I have to pick with you. I'm wondering if you've got a passion deficiency or something. It seems abnormal not to display a hint of bias now and then. -Suspicious Taurus." Dear Suspicious: My own birth chart includes elements of both Taurus and Libra. The Taurus part of me has strong feelings and deep passions, while the Libra part of me is fair-minded and well-balanced. They've worked out a synergistic arrangement that allows me to maintain my equilibrium as I feed my intensity. I recommend this approach to you right now.


To further explore the ripening challenges and blessings in your life, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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DEFINITION: Pronoia is the antidote for paranoia. It's the understanding that the universe is fundamentally friendly. It's a mode of retraining your senses and intellect so you're able to perceive that life always gives you exactly what you need, exactly when you need it.

HYPOTHESES: Evil is boring. Cynicism is idiotic. Fear is a bad habit. Despair is lazy. Joy is fascinating. Love is an act of heroic genius. Pleasure is our birthright. Receptivity is a superpower.

PROCEDURE: Act as if the universe is a prodigious miracle created for your amusement and illumination. Assume that secret helpers are working behind the scenes to assist you in turning into the gorgeous masterpiece you were born to be. Join the conspiracy to shower all of creation with blessings.
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The preceding oracle comes from the revised and expanded edition of my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. You can order it at Amazon or Barnes & Noble.

♊ GEMINI

(May 21-June 20)
Personally, I've never been very smart about making investments. At least in that area of my life, my intuition seems to work in reverse. I often do the precisely wrong thing at the wrong time. Billionaire businessman George Soros, on the other hand, is a genius. When facing a decision about which way to go financially, he says he becomes a jungle animal guided by actual sensations in his body. You Geminis have arrived at a phase when your choices could have long-term effects on your relationship with money. According to my reading of the astrological omens, you've got the potential to be like Soros rather than me. Trust your instincts.


Need more whacks applied to your mental blocks? More caresses bestowed upon your growing edge? Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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"The secret of life," said sculptor Henry Moore to poet Donald Hall, "is to have a task, something you devote your entire life to, something you bring everything to, every minute of the day for your whole life. And the most important thing is--it must be something you cannot possibly do." What is that task for you?
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The preceding oracle comes from the revised and expanded edition of my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. You can order it at Amazon or Barnes & Noble.

♋ CANCERIAN

(June 21-July 22)
This will be a smooth, easy, and graceful week for you -- if, that is, you get yourself out of the way and allow the universe to do its job. Can you do that? It doesn't mean you should be passive or blank. On the contrary, in order for the cosmos to perform its magic, you should be on the lookout for what captivates your imagination and be primed to jump when life says "jump!" Be both relaxed and alert; receptive and excitable; surrendered to the truth and in intimate contact with your primal power. Then the song will sing itself. The dream will interpret itself. The beauty will reveal itself.


Where do you want to go? Who do you want to be? For more clues, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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With luck and persistence, you will be able to claim the rewards promised you at the beginning of time--not just any old beauty, wisdom, goodness, love, freedom, and justice, but rather exhilarating beauty that incites you to be true to yourself; crazy wisdom that immunizes you against the temptation to believe your ideals are ultimate truths; outrageous goodness that inspires you to experiment with boisterous empathy; generous freedom that keeps you alert for opportunities to share your wealth; insurrectionary love that endlessly transforms you; and a lust for justice that's leavened with a knack for comedy, keeping you honest as you work humbly to liberate everyone in the world from ignorance and suffering.
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The preceding oracle comes from the revised and expanded edition of my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. You can order it at Amazon or Barnes & Noble.

♌ LEO

(July 23-August 22)
Mathematician Charles Babbage (1791-1871) is considered a "father of the computer." Among his many inventions, he created a mechanical calculator that was a forerunner of the magical device that's so indispensable today. And yet Babbage had other obsessions that were not as useful. For his own amusement, he once counted all of the panes of glass that had been broken in a factory over a period of 10 months, and investigated the cause of each break. He also spent an inordinate amount of time estimating the statistical probability that the miracles reported in the Bible had actually occurred. I bring this up, Leo, in the hope that you will concentrate on your own equivalent to Babbage's calculator, and not get sidetracked by meditations on broken glass and Biblical miracles.


Would you like to hear me say some more about your ever-evolving destiny? Check out your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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Thousands of things go right for you every day, beginning the moment you wake up. Through some magic you don't fully understand, you're still breathing and your heart is beating, even though you've been unconscious for many hours. The air is a mix of gases that's just right for your body's needs, as it was before you fell asleep.

You can see! Light of many colors floods into your eyes, registered by nerves that took God or evolution or some process millions of years to perfect. The interesting gift of these vivid hues is made possible by an unimaginably immense globe of fire, the sun, which continually detonates nuclear reactions in order to convert its own body into light and heat and energy for your personal use.

You can't live without the sun's inexhaustible flood of unconditional love. Every move you make depends on it. Luckily, it never fails you. Did you know that your personal star is located at the precise distance from you to be of consummate service? If it were any closer, you'd fry, and if it were any farther away, you'd freeze. Is that just a happy accident? Or is it a sign of favor -- a big, broad hint, from a cosmic intelligence that adores you?

Of the many things that have gone right for you during your time on Earth, the most crucial was your birth. As you crossed over the threshold, trading the warm dark sanctuary for the bright noisy enigma, you didn't die! It was a difficult act of high magic that involved many people who worked very hard in your behalf. The skills they provided in helping you navigate your rite of passage were in turn made possible by previous generations of threshold-tenders who bequeathed their expertise.

Months before that initiation, a more secret miracle bloomed: Your life began as a single cell, spawned by the explosive fusion of two highly specialized bundles of chromosomes. How could that tiny package of raw material have possibly grown a brain and liver and heart and stomach over a period of a few months? What inscrutable genius guided and oversaw the emergence of your fully formed infant body, that virtuoso creation, from the slimmest of clues?

You can drink a glass of water. You can spread butter on a slice of toast. You can wash your hair and prune your plants and draw infinity signs on a piece of paper. Your hands work wonderfully well! Their intricate force and sustained grace are amply supported by your heart, which circulates your blood all the way out to replenish the energy of the muscles and nerves in your fingers and palms and wrists. After your blood has delivered its blessings, it finds its way back to your heart to be refreshed. This masterful mystery repeats itself over and over again without you ever having to think about it.
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The preceding oracle comes from the revised and expanded edition of my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. You can order it at Amazon or Barnes & Noble.

♍ VIRGO

(August 23-September 22)
"Everything that emancipates the spirit without giving us control over ourselves is harmful," said Goethe. Luckily, Virgo, you're in the midst of a process that may emancipate your spirit and give you more control over yourself. Here are two ways you could cash in on this potential: 1. Brainstorm about a big dream even as you attend to the gritty details of making the dream a reality. 2. Expand your imagination about your tricky situation even as you burn away the illusions you have about your tricky situation.


Need more help deciphering the riddles and enigmas that fuel your destiny? Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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The poet Muriel Rukeyser said the universe is composed of stories, not of atoms. The physicist Werner Heisenberg declared that the universe is made of music, not of matter.

And we believe that if you habitually expose yourself to toxic stories and music, you could wind up living in the wrong universe, where it's impossible to become the gorgeous genius you were born to be. That's why we implore you to nourish yourself with delicious, nutritious tales and tunes that inspire you to exercise your willpower for your highest good.
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The preceding oracle comes from the revised and expanded edition of my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. You can order it at Amazon or Barnes & Noble.

♎ LIBRA

(September 23-October 22)
Have you heard about the new sport of chess boxing? Two competitors play chess for four minutes, then put on boxing gloves and try to punch each other for three minutes; they continue this rhythm for up to 11 rounds. I suspect you'll soon be asked to meet a similar challenge, going back and forth between two contrasting modes. If you treat this challenge as a fun game rather than a crazy-making exertion, you'll do fine.


No one knows you better than you do, but maybe I can help you dig up even more self-knowledge. Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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Six miles from Maui is a Hawaiian island that tourists never visit—Kaho'olawe. The U.S. Navy seized it in 1941 and used it as a target range for decades. After years of protests by Native Hawaiians, the Navy finally stopped bombing and began a clean-up campaign. In November, 2003, it formally turned control of the island over to the rightful owners.

"You can get a feel on Kaho'olawe of what it was like to live on Hawaii at the time of our ancestors," says Native Hawaiian Davianna McGregor. "We can practice our traditions there without it being a tourist attraction. It's one place we can go to be in communion with our natural life forces."
Each of us has a personal version of Kaho'olawe: a part of our psyche that has been stolen or colonized by hostile forces. To grow bolder in exploring pronoia, you'll need to take back yours.
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The preceding oracle comes from the revised and expanded edition of my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. You can order it at Amazon or Barnes & Noble.

♏ SCORPIO

(October 23-November 21)
A 13-year-old girl shocked everyone by winning a plowing contest in England. Driving a 12,000-pound tractor and pulling a five-furrow plow, Elly Deacon did a better job than all of the middle-aged male farmers she was competing against. What's more remarkable is that she was a newcomer, having had less than a week's experience in the fine art of tilling the soil with a giant machine. She's your role model for the coming week, Scorpio. Like her, you have the potential to perform wonders, even if you're a rookie, as you prepare a circumscribed area for future growth.


What better adventure is there than learning about your soul's code? For more hints, listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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"Whoever has, shall be given more and more," reads the Gospel of Matthew, "while whoever has nothing, even what he has will be taken away from him."

Pronoiac translation: Whatever you choose to focus your attention on, you will get more of it. If you often think of everything you lack and how sad you are that you don't have it, you will tend to receive abundant evidence of how true that is.

If, on the other hand, you dwell on the good things that make you feel grateful to be alive, they will probably multiply.
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The preceding oracle comes from the revised and expanded edition of my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. You can order it at Amazon or Barnes & Noble.

♐ SAGITTARIUS

(November 22-December 21)
I hope that by now you have finished scrabbling along on your hands and knees over burning hot shards of broken glass. The next and hopefully final phase of your redemptive quest should be less torturous. In this upcoming chapter, the operative metaphor might be assembling a jigsaw puzzle with 200 pieces, all of which are red. Amazingly enough, you actually have it in you to accomplish this improbable feat -- as long as you don't spread out the puzzle pieces all over the burning hot shards of broken glass. Find a nice, clean, quiet place to do your work.


Got enough clues to chew on for now? If you need more, listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE, where I go further in exploring your mysteries.

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I'm allergic to dogma. I thrive on riddles. Any idea I believe, I reserve the right to disbelieve as well. But more than any other vision I've ever tested, pronoia describes the way the world actually is. It's wetter than water, stronger than death, and truer than the news. It smells like cedar smoke in the autumn rain, and if you close your eyes right now, you can feel it shimmering like the aurora borealis in your organs and muscles. Its song is your blood's song.

Some people argue that life is strife and suffering is normal. Others swear we're born sinful and only heaven can provide us with the peace that passes understanding. But pronoia says that being alive on this rough green and brown planet is the highest honor and privilege. It's an invitation to work wonders and perform miracles that aren't possible in any nirvana, promised land, or afterlife.

I'm not exaggerating or indulging in poetic metaphor when I tell you that we are already living in paradise. Visualize it if you dare. The sweet stuff that quenches all of our longing is not far away in some other time and place. It's right here and right now.

Poet Elizabeth Barrett Browning knew the truth: "Earth's crammed with heaven."
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The preceding oracle comes from the revised and expanded edition of my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. You can order it at Amazon or Barnes & Noble.

♑ CAPRICORN

(December 22-January 19)
According to psychologist Carl Jung, one of the most potent influences that our parents have on us is their unlived lives. Whatever dreams they didn't pursue, whatever longings they didn't fulfill, are likely to worm their way into our core, often without our conscious awareness. There they get mixed up with our own dreams and longings, causing us confusion about what we really want. The coming weeks will be a good time for you to get clear about this. You'll have the power to untangle your own deepest, truest desires from the muffled wishes your mommy and daddy deposited in you.


For more help in understanding your relationship with the game of life, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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Quoting geneticists, Guy Murchie says we're all family. You have at least a million relatives as close as tenth cousin, and no one on Earth is any farther removed than your 50th cousin.

Murchie also describes our kinship through an analysis of how deeply we share the air. With each breath, you take into your body 10 sextillion atoms, and--owing to the wind's ceaseless circulation--over a year's time you have intimate relations with oxygen molecules exhaled by every person alive, as well as by everyone who ever lived. Right now you may be carrying atoms that were once inside the lungs of Malcolm X, Christopher Columbus, Joan of Arc, and Cleopatra.
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The preceding oracle comes from the revised and expanded edition of my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. You can order it at Amazon or Barnes & Noble.

♒ AQUARIUS

(January 20- February 18)
"Awesome" has become a commonplace word that is used to express gladness about small triumphs and simple pleasures. Today, for instance, a woman at the local cafe uttered a sweet "Awesome!" when someone pointed out to her where she could find an electrical outlet to plug in her laptop. Back in the old days, however, "awesome" was a portentous term invoked only rarely. "Awe" referred to an overwhelming feeling of wonder, reverence, admiration, inspiration, or even agitation in the face of a sublime or numinous experience. In the coming week, Aquarius, I expect you will experience more than your usual quota of both kinds of awesome.


Would you like further inspiration as you strive to make the most of life's opportunities? Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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You're like an arrow in flight. You're a half-cooked feast, the fifth month of pregnancy, the week before a big election. Have you ever mastered a second language? You resemble the time right before fluency arrives.
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The preceding oracle comes from the revised and expanded edition of my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. You can order it at Amazon or Barnes & Noble.

♓ PISCES

(February 19-March 20)
According to Leonardo da Vinci, you could magnify the power of your prayers or meditations ten-fold by bathing in purple light. Back in his time, that was easiest to accomplish by standing near a church's stained glass window that was tinted purple. These days you can get the same effect with the help of a purple light bulb. Alternately, you could simply close your eyes and visualize yourself surrounded by a shimmering purple glow. I recommend this practice for you in the coming days. It's an excellent time to do anything and everything to intensify your spiritual power. P.S. Experts in color theory say that purple nurtures the development of the imagination, which would be of great value to you as you tone and firm your devotional impulses.


What exactly are you looking for? It's possible my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE could give you additional help in figuring that out.

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Try this meditation: Imagine that you are the wood and the fire that consumes the wood.

First, focus your awareness on the part of you that is the wood. You may tremble or gasp, feeling the jolt of your solidity disintegrating, your form changing. As you shift your attention to the part of you that is the fire, you may exult in the wild joy of power and liberation.

It may be tempting to favor the fire over the wood, to love the burning more than the being burned. But if you'd like to understand pronoia in its fullness, you've got to appreciate them equally. Can you imagine yourself being the fire and wood simultaneously? Is it possible for you to experience the deep pleasure of their collaboration?
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Scientists have confirmed what we all knew: You do indeed have a little voice in your head that warns you when you're about to do something dumb. It's called the anterior cingulate cortex, according to white-coated authorities at Carnegie-Mellon University. If you're receptive to it, it's as good as having a guardian angel.

"Don't do it," the voice whispers when you're on the verge of locking your keys in your car or leaving the bar with the cute drunk you just met. "Go back," it murmurs as you start to walk away from a huge, though initially inconvenient, opportunity.
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The preceding oracle comes from the revised and expanded edition of my book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. You can order it at Amazon or Barnes & Noble.

© Rob Brezsny 1995-2024