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Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny


Week of November 21st, 2013

♈ ARIES

(March 21-April 19)
The poet Charles Baudelaire prayed for help, but not to God -- rather he prayed to the writer Edgar Allan Poe. Novelist Malcolm Lowry sometimes pleaded with God to give him insight, but he also prayed to the writer Franz Kafka. I really like this approach to seeking guidance, and recommend it to you in the coming days. Which hero, dead or alive, could you call on to uplift you? What amazing character might bring you the inspiration you need? Be brazen and imaginative. The spirits could be of more help than you can imagine. Magic is afoot.


What exactly are you looking for? How would you describe the experiences you want more than anything else? It's possible my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE could give you additional help in figuring that out.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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I'm allergic to dogma. I thrive on riddles. Any idea I believe, I reserve the right to disbelieve as well. But more than any other vision I've ever tested, pronoia describes the way the world actually is. It's wetter than water, stronger than death, and truer than the news. It smells like cedar smoke in the autumn rain, and if you close your eyes right now, you can feel it shimmering like the aurora borealis in your organs and muscles. Its song is your blood's song.

Some people argue that life is strife and suffering is normal. Others swear we're born sinful and only heaven can provide us with the peace that passes understanding. But pronoia says that being alive on this rough green and brown planet is the highest honor and privilege. It's an invitation to work wonders and perform miracles that aren't possible in any nirvana, promised land, or afterlife.

I'm not exaggerating or indulging in poetic metaphor when I tell you that we are already living in paradise. Visualize it if you dare. The sweet stuff that quenches all of our longing is not far away in some other time and place. It's right here and right now.

Poet Elizabeth Barrett Browning knew the truth: "Earth's crammed with heaven."

♉ TAURUS

(April 20-May 20)
U.S. Confederate General Richard S. Ewell (1817-1872) sometimes experienced episodes in which he truly thought he was a bird. Princess Alexandria of Bavaria (1826-1875) believed that when she was young, she had eaten a glass piano. Then there was the Prussian military officer Gebhard Leberecht von Blucher (1742-1819), who imagined he was pregnant with an elephant. Sad and funny and crazy, right? And yet it's my understanding that all of us have fixed delusions. They are less bizarre than those I cited, but they can still be debilitating. What are yours, Taurus? Do you secretly believe that a certain turning point in your past scarred you forever? Are you incorrectly wracked with anger or guilt because of some event that may not have actually happened the way you remember it? Here's the good news: Now is an excellent time to shed your fixed delusions.


Want to hear more about the subconscious factors and hidden forces that may be influencing your life? Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Quoting geneticists, Guy Murchie says we're all family. You have at least a million relatives as close as tenth cousin, and no one on Earth is any farther removed than your 50th cousin.

Murchie also describes our kinship through an analysis of how deeply we share the air. With each breath, you take into your body 10 sextillion atoms, and--owing to the wind's ceaseless circulation--over a year's time you have intimate relations with oxygen molecules exhaled by every person alive, as well as by everyone who ever lived. Right now you may be carrying atoms that were once inside the lungs of Malcolm X, Christopher Columbus, Joan of Arc, and Cleopatra.

♊ GEMINI

(May 21-June 20)
Philosopher Eckhart Tolle suggests that "there may be one person who reflects your love back to you more clearly and more intensely than others." For some of us, this numinous reflection comes from a special animal. Whatever is the case for you, Gemini, I urge you to devote extra time to your relationship with this creature in the next 14 days. Meditate on how you could provide more nurturing and inspiration. Brainstorm about the possibility of deepening your connection. What practical actions could you take to boost your loved one's fortunes?


To further explore the ripening blessings and interesting challenges in your life, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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More and more creative people find they do their best work when they're feeling healthy and secure. We know writers who no longer need to be drunk or in agony in order to shed the numbness of their daily routine and tap into the full powers of their imagination. We have filmmaker friends whose best work flows not from the depths of alienated self-doubt but rather from the heights of well-earned bliss. Singer-songwriter P.J. Harvey is the patron saint of this new breed. "When I'm contented, I'm more open to receiving a lot of inspiration," she has testified. "I'm most creative when I feel safe and happy."

♋ CANCERIAN

(June 21-July 22)
The Cancerian soprano Kirsten Flagstad was regarded as one of the great operatic singers of the 20th century. Critic Desmond Shawe-Taylor said that "No one within living memory surpassed her in sheer beauty and consistency of line and tone." She specialized in the operas of German composer Richard Wagner, whose master work, The Ring of the Nibelung, takes 15 hours to perform. Flagstad was asked to name the single most important thing she needed in order to perform Wagner's music with the excellence it demanded. Her answer: comfortable shoes. Regard that as good advice for your own life and work, Cancerian -- both literally and metaphorically. It's time to get really well-grounded.


Need more whacks applied to your mental blocks? More caresses bestowed upon your growing edge? Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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The sage and her student were standing by a pool discussing longing and ambition.

"What do you want more than anything else?" the sage asked.

"To perfect my ability to love all of creation the way I love myself," the young man replied.

At that moment, the sage tackled the student and shoved his head beneath the water. Accustomed to letting his teacher shape the unpredictable contours of his education, he did not resist.

One minute went by. Then another. The student began to struggle and kick. His teacher was strong.

Finally she released her grip and the student surfaced, fighting for breath.

"What did you want more than anything else during these last few minutes?" the sage inquired.

"Nothing else was in my mind except the desire for air," gasped the student.

"Excellent," beamed the sage. "As soon as you are equally single-minded in your desire to perfect your ability to love all of creation the way you love yourself, you will achieve your goal."

♌ LEO

(July 23-August 22)
Have you ever been in a social situation where you really didn't care what anyone thought of you and therefore felt absolutely free to act on your inner promptings? When was the last time you lost all your inhibitions and self-consciousness while making love? Can you truly say that sometime recently you have been totally responsive to your festive impulses? If you have experienced any blockages in expressing this type of energy, now is a perfect moment to fix that. You have a date with robust, innocent self-expression.


Where do you want to go? Who do you want to be? For more clues, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Go to the ugliest or most forlorn place you know--a drugstore parking lot, the front porch of a crack house, a toxic waste dump, or the place that symbolizes your secret shame--and build a shrine devoted to beauty, truth, and love.

Here are some suggestions about what to put in your shrine: a silk scarf; a smooth rock on which you've inscribed a haiku or joke with a felt-tip pen; coconut cookies or ginger candy; pumpkin seeds and an origami crane; a green kite shaped like a dragon; a music CD you love; a photo of your hero; a votive candle carved with your word of power; a rubber ducky; a bouquet of fresh beets; a print of Van Gogh's "Starry Night."

♍ VIRGO

(August 23-September 22)
Norwegian public television is experimenting with a phenomenon called Slow TV. In one reality show, the main character built a fire with logs and kept it burning for 12 hours. In another program, patient viewers watched for five days as a cruise ship made its way along the Norwegian coast. A third show featured a woman knitting a sweater from start to finish. I wish you would get hooked on slow-motion activities like those, Virgo. Maybe it would help you lower your thoughts-per-minute rate and influence you to take longer, deeper breaths and remember that relaxation is an art you can cultivate. And then you would be in righteous alignment with the cosmic rhythms.


Would you like to hear me say some more about your ever-evolving destiny? Check out your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Late at night when there's no traffic, stride down the middle of an empty road that by day is crawling with cars. Dance, careen, and sing songs that fill you with pleasurable emotions. Splay your arms triumphantly as you extemporize prayers in which you make extravagant demands and promises. Give pet names to the trees you pass, declare your admiration for the workers who made the road, and celebrate your sovereignty over a territory that usually belongs to heavy machines and their operators.

♎ LIBRA

(September 23-October 22)
You're smarter than you think you are, and soon you will be even smarter. Previously inaccessible wisdom is seeping up from the depths of your subconscious mind, making its way to your conscious awareness. Your eyes are noticing more than they usually do. Your memory is working at peak levels. And your enhanced ability to entertain paradoxical ideas is giving you special insight into the nature of reality. What will you do with this influx of higher intelligence? I suggest you focus its full force on one of your knottiest problems.


Need more help deciphering the riddles and enigmas that are fueling your amazing story? Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Contrary to what some translations of the Bible say, it won't be the meek who shall inherit the earth. On the other hand, the arrogant power mongers won't collect the legacy either. Neither the indecisive wimps nor the acquisitive bullies will contribute much to creating the New World.

Who, then, will inherit the earth? What kind of human beings are best-equipped to thrive in the evolving game of life? We say it will be the well-disciplined pleasure-seekers who are in vigorous dialogue with their own dark sides, who balance the masculine and feminine aspects of their natures, and who master the fine arts of working at their play and playing at their work.

Assume our definition has some validity for you. What would you have to do to become more like one of the inheritors of the earth?

♏ SCORPIO

(October 23-November 21)
The Paris Review interviewed Mexican poet Octavio Paz. "Just how much revising do you do?" the interviewer asked. "I revise incessantly," Paz replied. "Some critics say too much, and they may be right. But if there's a danger in revising, there is much more danger in not revising. I believe in inspiration, but I also believe that we've got to help inspiration, restrain it, and even contradict it." I bring this up, Scorpio, because I believe you are ripe for a phase of intense revision. Inspiration has visited you a lot lately, but now it will subside for a while so you can wrangle all your raw material into graceful, resilient, enduring shapes.


No one knows you better than you do, but maybe I can help you dig up even more self-knowledge. Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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Dear Beauty and Truth Lab: Can you tell me why my trivial prayers are often answered (please don't let the light turn red, please let there be enough milk for one cup of coffee, etc.), but never my big life-changing prayers (please send me a soul mate, please help me make money at what I love to do)? Are God's priorities screwed up, or is it me? - Dumb Luck Collector

Dear DLC: There's an old fairy tale in which two old folks are given three wishes by a magic dwarf, but impulsively waste them on the first silly whims that pop into their heads. I'll tell you what I would have told them: Proceed on the assumption that only a few of your fervent prayers will be granted. Don't use them up on pleas for convenience when you're tired, cranky, or desperate. A Tibetan proverb says, "The person who gets stuck on petty happiness will not attain great happiness."

♐ SAGITTARIUS

(November 22-December 21)
Costa Rica will be closing its zoos in 2014. What will happen to the 400 or so animals that are housed there? They will have to be rehabilitated at animal rescue centers and then released into the wild. I suspect there will be a metaphorically similar process going on for you in the coming months, Sagittarius. Parts of your instinctual nature will, in a sense, be freed from captivity. You will need to find ways to retrain your animal intelligence how to function outside of the tame conditions it got used to.


Wouldn't you love to learn more about who you really are? What better adventure is there than learning about your soul's code? For more hints, listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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DEFINITION: Pronoia is the antidote for paranoia. It's the understanding that the universe is fundamentally friendly. It's a mode of retraining your senses and intellect so you're able to perceive that life always gives you exactly what you need, exactly when you need it.

HYPOTHESES: Evil is boring. Cynicism is idiotic. Fear is a bad habit. Despair is lazy. Joy is fascinating. Love is an act of heroic genius. Pleasure is our birthright. Receptivity is a superpower.

PROCEDURE: Act as if the universe is a prodigious miracle created for your amusement and illumination. Assume that secret helpers are working behind the scenes to assist you in turning into the gorgeous masterpiece you were born to be. Join the conspiracy to shower all of creation with blessings.

♑ CAPRICORN

(December 22-January 19)
Will fate kick your sweet ass sometime soon? Quite possibly. You may be compelled to face up to the consequences of your unloving actions or unconscious decisions. I'm pleased to tell you, however, that you might be able to dramatically minimize or even neutralize the butt-thumping. How? Go over the events of the last 11 months, and identify times when you weren't your very best self or didn't live up to your highest ideals. Then perform rituals of atonement. Express your desire to correct wrong turns. Give gifts that will heal damaged dynamics.


I hope the oracle above provides you with the inspiration you need to do what you've got to do and change what needs to be changed. But if you need more clues, listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE, where I go further in exploring your mysteries.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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"The secret of life," said sculptor Henry Moore to poet Donald Hall, "is to have a task, something you devote your entire life to, something you bring everything to, every minute of the day for your whole life. And the most important thing is--it must be something you cannot possibly do." What is that task for you?

♒ AQUARIUS

(January 20- February 18)
Grammy-winning singer-songwriter Bill Withers became a big star in the 1970s with hits like "Ain't No Sunshine" and "Lean on Me." But he hasn't recorded a new album since 1985, nor has he toured. What happened? In Still Bill, the documentary film about his life, Withers says, "I watch other people show off and I say, man, I used to want to show off. If I could just get, you know, moved to. I need a little injection in my showin' off gland." I wish you could get an injection like that, too, Aquarius. I'd like to see you show off more. Not in a contrived, over-the-top, Lady Gaga-esque way. Rather, the purpose would be to get more aggressive in showing people who you are and what you can do. I want your talents and assets to be better known.


For more help in understanding your relationship with the game of life, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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With luck and persistence, you will be able to claim the rewards promised you at the beginning of time -- not just any old beauty, wisdom, goodness, love, freedom, and justice, but rather exhilarating beauty that incites you to be true to yourself; crazy wisdom that immunizes you against the temptation to believe your ideals are ultimate truths; outrageous goodness that inspires you to experiment with boisterous empathy; generous freedom that keeps you alert for opportunities to share your wealth; insurrectionary love that endlessly transforms you; and a lust for justice that's leavened with a knack for comedy, keeping you honest as you work humbly to liberate everyone in the world from ignorance and suffering.

♓ PISCES

(February 19-March 20)
I have a feeling that your value will be rising in the coming weeks. An attractive person you thought was out of your league may express curiosity about you. You could get an offer to do an interesting job or task that you had previously considered unavailable. I bet your reputation will be growing, mostly for the better. Who knows? If you put a half-eaten piece of your toast for sale on eBay, it might sell for as much as if it were Justin Timberlake's toast. Here's the upshot: You should have confidence in your power to attract bigger rewards and more appreciation.


Would you like further inspiration as you scheme and dream to make the most of life's sometimes puzzling opportunities? Listen to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE.

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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is excerpted from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.
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"You can get a feel on Kaho'olawe of what it was like to live on Hawaii at the time of our ancestors," says Native Hawaiian Davianna McGregor. "We can practice our traditions there without it being a tourist attraction. It's one place we can go to be in communion with our natural life forces."
Each of us has a personal version of Kaho'olawe: a part of our psyche that has been stolen or colonized by hostile forces. To grow bolder in exploring pronoia, you'll need to take back yours.


Listen to Rob's Expanded Audio Horoscopes, updated weekly.



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