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Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny
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♏ SCORPIO
(October 23-November 21)
Factual information and reasonable thinking alone are not sufficient to guide you through life’s labyrinthine tests. You need and deserve regular deliveries of uncanny revelation. One of your inalienable rights as a human being should therefore be to receive mysteriously useful omens on a regular basis. In this spirit, I offer you the free weekly horoscopes you read here. If you ever want more, and think it's worth paying for, try my daily text message 'scopes or my expanded audio 'scopes.
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SACRED ADVERTISEMENT
Some people feel polluted when they look at porn; others when they eat Pringles and Twinkies. Personally, I experience a sense of violation after being exposed to celebrity gossip. And yet, if I've learned anything about how to maintain a healthy relationship with purity, it's that a fanatical adherence to it is as dangerous as a compulsive rejection of it. This will be especially true for you as you practice the art of pronoia. I urge you, therefore, to rebel cagily now and then against your urge to be a perfectly nice perpetrator of goodness and beauty and truth and justice.
Here's one method that might work: Use sacred sarcasm to motivate your allies to cooperate more with life's benevolent conspiracy. For instance, you might say the following to a certain female friend, hoping it will prod her to swear off self-punishing behavior forever: "You sure honored your ancestors and left an inspiring legacy for your descendants during the month you spent courting that alcoholic womanizer."
Or say something like this to a person who has not been asking for enough in return for her gifts: "No doubt you impressed the gods and earned a heap of karmic credit for all the free work you gave away to that megalomaniac who ripped you off so brilliantly."
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The preceding oracle comes from my new book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.